Quote

Net neutrality: The only two words that promise more boredom in the English language are 'featuring Sting,'

John Oliver

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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
Neutrality
Boredom
English
Promise
Words
Language
Two
Featuring
Sting

More quotes by John Oliver

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I feel more at home knowing I'm not really at home. It takes all the pressure off you trying to fit in!
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Everybody should care about facts. That is something all of us should agree on.
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Teenagers falling off skateboards - funny. Nut shots - funny. Breaking wind - funny. The world cannot change those. Those three things are columns upon which humor is built.
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I think being an outsider in general always helps you in comedy. I think it helps to have an outsider's eye. And so I have an outsider's voice. You know, as soon as I start talking, I don't belong here. And I think that helps in a way.
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I do not want to leave in [U.S.] ... I cannot make that clear enough to immigration authorities who may be listening to this interview. I don't want to leave, so please don't make me.
John Oliver
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Pumpkin spice lattes are egg nog for morning people.
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Having a human conversation is not something I've had any training in either as a comedian or as, you know, a human being.
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It's pretty physically unsettling, living life on a visa.
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Wow. Losing 95 percent of your audience in just five years. That basically makes Obama the NBC of presidents.
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Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
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Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back.
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There are two kinds of hecklers: the destructive and constructive hecklers.
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I knew I was going to go into the field and make fun of people to their faces. I knew what I was getting into.
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I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to do by a British accent. That's why so many infomercials have British people.
John Oliver
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I would hate to meet myself at 15.
John Oliver
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You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.
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Welcome to The Daily Show, I'm John Oliver. Jon Stewart is still not here. He is currently living out a live-action Lord of the Rings role-playing experience deep in the New Zealand wilderness.
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The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked.
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Whatever the occasion, [the Queen] has a face which demonstrably says 'I don't give a royal s**t.'
John Oliver
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People, I guess, generally come to see me do stand-up with a working knowledge of my broad sense of humor on The Daily Show ... I don't think anyone would mistake me as an actual anchor.
John Oliver