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Welcome to The Daily Show, I'm John Oliver. Jon Stewart is still not here. He is currently living out a live-action Lord of the Rings role-playing experience deep in the New Zealand wilderness.

John Oliver

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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
Shows
Deep
Zealand
Stills
Roles
Currently
Still
Playing
Wilderness
Live
Lord
Rings
Show
Welcome
Living
John
Experience
Daily
Oliver
Action
Role
Stewart

More quotes by John Oliver

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In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup, you don't really want to be listening to what somebody is saying you want to project your jokes into their face.
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I think I'm just a summer fling that people will soon forget.
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Here in America, people come out to see what they've known you to do. In England it's like everyone comes out to tell you exactly how well they think you're doing.
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Every empire has to get sucked down the drain. As a British person, I know how it feels.
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I get nostalgic for British negativity. There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. When you go back to Britain, everybody is just running everything down. It's like whatever the opposite of a hug is.
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The disconnect between America and its military is shocking.
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It's exciting to have a role in anything that's Claymation, just because you're always intrigued by what a clay wizard version of yourself would be.
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When you're dealing with serious subjects, there is a pressure to be absolutely sure that you know what you're doing.
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Democracy is like a tambourine, not everyone can be trusted with it.
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Southern people are bigger-hearted and kinder than I had any right to expect.
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Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
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If your name is Sepp, at the bare minimum you’ve strangled someone in a bar fight.
John Oliver
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Net neutrality: The only two words that promise more boredom in the English language are 'featuring Sting,'
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Iran is the middle child of the Axis of Evil. Iraq is the oldest child and gets the lion's share of the attention, and North Korea is the crazy baby.
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There are two kinds of hecklers: the destructive and constructive hecklers.
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It's pretty physically unsettling, living life on a visa.
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Anybody who claims to be excited for April Fools' Day is probably a sociopath.
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The poverty line is like the age of consent: if you find yourself parsing exactly where it is, you’ve probably already done something very, very wrong.
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I've made so many people angry that they kind of blur into one unpleasant memory of people staring at you with somewhere between passive aggression and active aggression.
John Oliver
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If you’re asking me, would I have voted for Mitt Romney, the answer is absolutely not. Emphatically not. I cannot envision a world in which I would have voted for Mitt Romney unless I sustained a massive concussion.
John Oliver