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I have exactly as much rhythm as you think I have.
John Oliver
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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
Much
Think
Thinking
Rhythm
Exactly
More quotes by John Oliver
It's a great time to be doing political satire when the world is on a knife edge.
John Oliver
Welcome to The Daily Show, I'm John Oliver. Jon Stewart is still not here. He is currently living out a live-action Lord of the Rings role-playing experience deep in the New Zealand wilderness.
John Oliver
One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.
John Oliver
I feel more at home knowing I'm not really at home. It takes all the pressure off you trying to fit in!
John Oliver
There is no greater anesthetic than sport.
John Oliver
In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup, you don't really want to be listening to what somebody is saying you want to project your jokes into their face.
John Oliver
I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to do by a British accent. That's why so many infomercials have British people.
John Oliver
You can write jokes at any point of the day. Jokes are not that hard to write, or they shouldn't be when it is literally your job.
John Oliver
Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back.
John Oliver
I'm British. I don't really have access to my emotions on a daily basis.
John Oliver
Americans just don't understand dry wit.
John Oliver
I would hate to meet myself at 15.
John Oliver
Politicians don't really bring up religion in England.
John Oliver
I guess the tone of jokes is often, at best, irreverent, but it always comes from a place of deep love.
John Oliver
It's exciting to have a role in anything that's Claymation, just because you're always intrigued by what a clay wizard version of yourself would be.
John Oliver
Congress never loses its capacity to disappoint you.
John Oliver
I've made so many people angry that they kind of blur into one unpleasant memory of people staring at you with somewhere between passive aggression and active aggression.
John Oliver
I knew I was going to go into the field and make fun of people to their faces. I knew what I was getting into.
John Oliver
I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior.
John Oliver
Democracy is like a tambourine, not everyone can be trusted with it.
John Oliver