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I suppose true sexual equality will come when a general called Anthea is found having an unwise lunch with a young, unreliable model from Spain.

John Mortimer

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John Mortimer
Age: 85 †
Born: 1923
Born: April 21
Died: 2009
Died: January 16
Barrister
Novelist
Poet Lawyer
Screenwriter
Writer
Hampstead Village
Sir John Clifford Mortimer
Sir John Mortimer
John Clifford Mortimer
General
Unreliable
Called
Spain
Found
Lunch
True
Sexual
Young
Equality
Come
Model
Suppose
Models
Unwise

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People will go to endless trouble to divorce one person and then marry someone who is exactly the same, except probably a bit poorer and a bit nastier. I don't think anybody learns anything.
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We may not be the creme de la creme, but we are the creme de la scum.
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When... I told my father I wanted to be a writer, he had asked me to consider my unfortunate wife, who would have me about the house all day 'wearing a dressing gown, brewing tea and stumped for words'.
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Never believe a rumour until you hear it officially denied.
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The officers of the branch of the Force (the Obscene Publications Squad) have a discouraging club tie, on which a book is depicted being cut in half by a larger pair of scissors.
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The only rule I have found to have any validity in writing is not to bore yourself.
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The people look forbidding, solemn, marked by that impossible ideal, Communism, which, like Christianity, seemed to demand too much of humanity and, falling into the wrong hands, led too easily to horrible brutality.
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Like childhood, old age is irresponsible, reckless, and foolhardy. Children and old people have everything to gain and nothing much to lose. It's middle-age which is cursed by the desperate need to cling to some finger-hold halfway up the mountain, to conform, not to cause trouble, to behave well.
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Farce is tragedy played at a thousand revolutions per minute.
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To escape jury duty in England, wear a bowler hat and carry a copy of the Daily telegraph.
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All the flower children were as alike as a congress of accountants and about as interesting.
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Marriage is like pleading guilty to an indefinite sentence. Without parole.
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What obsesses a writer starting out on a lifetime's work is the panic-stricken search for a voice of his own.
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I don't think you ever feel a success really because everything could always be done better than you've done it.
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No brilliance is needed in the law. Nothing but common sense, and relatively clean finger nails.
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There is always time for failure
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I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There is no pleasure worth foregoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.
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It is desperately important to remember when enough is enough, when you've finished the scene.
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Success is good for the character.
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A war against terrorism is an impracticable conception if it means fighting terrorism with terrorism.
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