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All the flower children were as alike as a congress of accountants and about as interesting.

John Mortimer

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John Mortimer
Age: 85 †
Born: 1923
Born: April 21
Died: 2009
Died: January 16
Barrister
Novelist
Poet Lawyer
Screenwriter
Writer
Hampstead Village
Sir John Clifford Mortimer
Sir John Mortimer
John Clifford Mortimer
Accountants
Aggravation
Alike
Congress
Flower
Interesting
Children

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I suppose that writers should, in a way, feel flattered by the censorship laws. They show a primitive fear and dread at the fearful magic of print.
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What obsesses a writer starting out on a lifetime's work is the panic-stricken search for a voice of his own.
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I had inherited what my father called the art of the advocate, or the irritating habit of looking for the flaw in any argument.
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Marriage is like pleading guilty to an indefinite sentence. Without parole.
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The only rule I have found to have any validity in writing is not to bore yourself.
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Farce is tragedy played at a thousand revolutions per minute.
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I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There is no pleasure worth foregoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.
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Success is good for the character.
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No brilliance is needed in the law. Nothing but common sense, and relatively clean finger nails.
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The officers of the branch of the Force (the Obscene Publications Squad) have a discouraging club tie, on which a book is depicted being cut in half by a larger pair of scissors.
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It is desperately important to remember when enough is enough, when you've finished the scene.
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I don't think you ever feel a success really because everything could always be done better than you've done it.
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I knew nothing about farce until I read Puce a l'Oreille, and had no idea what a deadly serious business it is.
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The people look forbidding, solemn, marked by that impossible ideal, Communism, which, like Christianity, seemed to demand too much of humanity and, falling into the wrong hands, led too easily to horrible brutality.
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We may not be the creme de la creme, but we are the creme de la scum.
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My father, to whom I owe so much, never told me the difference between right and wrong now I think that's why I remain so greatly in his debt.
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Like childhood, old age is irresponsible, reckless, and foolhardy. Children and old people have everything to gain and nothing much to lose. It's middle-age which is cursed by the desperate need to cling to some finger-hold halfway up the mountain, to conform, not to cause trouble, to behave well.
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There's more of yourself in a book than a play. that's why we know all about Dickens and not much about Shakespeare. Ben Jonson murdered people Marlowe was a spy Shakespeare just sat in the corner and took notes.
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Check-ups are, in my experience, a grave mistake all they do is allow the quack of your choice to tell you that you have some sort of complaint that you were far happier not knowing about.
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People will go to endless trouble to divorce one person and then marry someone who is exactly the same, except probably a bit poorer and a bit nastier. I don't think anybody learns anything.
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