Quote

Dying is a matter of slapstick and pratfalls. The ageing process is not gradual or gentle. It rushes up, pushes you over and runs off laughing. No one should grow old who isn't ready to appear ridiculous.

John Mortimer

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

John Mortimer
Age: 85 †
Born: 1923
Born: April 21
Died: 2009
Died: January 16
Barrister
Novelist
Poet Lawyer
Screenwriter
Writer
Hampstead Village
Sir John Clifford Mortimer
Sir John Mortimer
John Clifford Mortimer
Laughing
Ageing
Grow
Pushes
Ready
Gradual
Grows
Runs
Process
Gentle
Running
Appear
Matter
Ridiculous
Slapstick
Dying
Rushes

More quotes by John Mortimer

Image
I had inherited what my father called the art of the advocate, or the irritating habit of looking for the flaw in any argument.
John Mortimer
Image
The officers of the branch of the Force (the Obscene Publications Squad) have a discouraging club tie, on which a book is depicted being cut in half by a larger pair of scissors.
John Mortimer
Image
Marriage is like pleading guilty to an indefinite sentence. Without parole.
John Mortimer
Image
All the flower children were as alike as a congress of accountants and about as interesting.
John Mortimer
Image
No brilliance is needed in the law. Nothing but common sense, and relatively clean finger nails.
John Mortimer
Image
Hell must be a place where you are only allowed to read what you agree with.
John Mortimer
Image
I found criminal clients easy and matrimonial clients hard. Matrimonial clients hate each other so much and use their children to hurt each other in beastly ways. Murderers have usually killed the one person in the world that was bugging them and they're usually quite peaceful and agreeable.
John Mortimer
Image
I knew nothing about farce until I read Puce a l'Oreille, and had no idea what a deadly serious business it is.
John Mortimer
Image
What obsesses a writer starting out on a lifetime's work is the panic-stricken search for a voice of his own.
John Mortimer
Image
Like childhood, old age is irresponsible, reckless, and foolhardy. Children and old people have everything to gain and nothing much to lose. It's middle-age which is cursed by the desperate need to cling to some finger-hold halfway up the mountain, to conform, not to cause trouble, to behave well.
John Mortimer
Image
I don't think you ever feel a success really because everything could always be done better than you've done it.
John Mortimer
Image
We may not be the creme de la creme, but we are the creme de la scum.
John Mortimer
Image
A war against terrorism is an impracticable conception if it means fighting terrorism with terrorism.
John Mortimer
Image
The only rule I have found to have any validity in writing is not to bore yourself.
John Mortimer
Image
Check-ups are, in my experience, a grave mistake all they do is allow the quack of your choice to tell you that you have some sort of complaint that you were far happier not knowing about.
John Mortimer
Image
There is always time for failure
John Mortimer
Image
People will go to endless trouble to divorce one person and then marry someone who is exactly the same, except probably a bit poorer and a bit nastier. I don't think anybody learns anything.
John Mortimer
Image
To escape jury duty in England, wear a bowler hat and carry a copy of the Daily telegraph.
John Mortimer
Image
I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There is no pleasure worth foregoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.
John Mortimer
Image
Success is good for the character.
John Mortimer