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Check-ups are, in my experience, a grave mistake all they do is allow the quack of your choice to tell you that you have some sort of complaint that you were far happier not knowing about.
John Mortimer
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John Mortimer
Age: 85 †
Born: 1923
Born: April 21
Died: 2009
Died: January 16
Barrister
Novelist
Poet Lawyer
Screenwriter
Writer
Hampstead Village
Sir John Clifford Mortimer
Sir John Mortimer
John Clifford Mortimer
Tell
Checks
Quack
Allow
Quacks
Choice
Complaint
Mistake
Complaints
Sort
Happier
Choices
Check
Knowing
Grave
Experience
Graves
More quotes by John Mortimer
The only rule I have found to have any validity in writing is not to bore yourself.
John Mortimer
The point at which beliefs meet may be more significant, more useful to contemplate, than their sources.
John Mortimer
I had inherited what my father called the art of the advocate, or the irritating habit of looking for the flaw in any argument.
John Mortimer
The people look forbidding, solemn, marked by that impossible ideal, Communism, which, like Christianity, seemed to demand too much of humanity and, falling into the wrong hands, led too easily to horrible brutality.
John Mortimer
We may not be the creme de la creme, but we are the creme de la scum.
John Mortimer
When... I told my father I wanted to be a writer, he had asked me to consider my unfortunate wife, who would have me about the house all day 'wearing a dressing gown, brewing tea and stumped for words'.
John Mortimer
The officers of the branch of the Force (the Obscene Publications Squad) have a discouraging club tie, on which a book is depicted being cut in half by a larger pair of scissors.
John Mortimer
Success is good for the character.
John Mortimer
Never believe a rumour until you hear it officially denied.
John Mortimer
People will go to endless trouble to divorce one person and then marry someone who is exactly the same, except probably a bit poorer and a bit nastier. I don't think anybody learns anything.
John Mortimer
A war against terrorism is an impracticable conception if it means fighting terrorism with terrorism.
John Mortimer
My father, to whom I owe so much, never told me the difference between right and wrong now I think that's why I remain so greatly in his debt.
John Mortimer
Hell must be a place where you are only allowed to read what you agree with.
John Mortimer
I don't think you ever feel a success really because everything could always be done better than you've done it.
John Mortimer
There is always time for failure
John Mortimer
I knew nothing about farce until I read Puce a l'Oreille, and had no idea what a deadly serious business it is.
John Mortimer
Farce is tragedy played at a thousand revolutions per minute.
John Mortimer
I suppose true sexual equality will come when a general called Anthea is found having an unwise lunch with a young, unreliable model from Spain.
John Mortimer
I refuse to spend my life worrying about what I eat. There is no pleasure worth foregoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward.
John Mortimer
What obsesses a writer starting out on a lifetime's work is the panic-stricken search for a voice of his own.
John Mortimer