Quote

I have learned that newborn infants roll their eyes around and move their heads and their arms in short jerky spasms. And if you homeschool them, they will stay this way forever.

John Hodgman

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John Hodgman
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: June 3
Author
Comedian
Film Actor
Podcaster
Presenter
Television Actor
Writer
Brookline
Massachusetts
John Kellogg Hodgman
Around
Arms
Jerky
Way
Stay
Spasms
Move
Infants
Learned
Newborn
Eyes
Infant
Forever
Heads
Eye
Roll
Moving
Short

More quotes by John Hodgman

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Traffic counting was very boring and cold to sit out on the streets of New Haven in five pairs of pants - well, that's an exaggeration it was three pairs of pants - in November for hours and hours clicking buttons counting which cars go left, right, and forward.
John Hodgman
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I would definitely make eggs for the rest of my life if I could.
John Hodgman
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My whole creative career is a product of the Internet. ...I'll take that back. To some degree. My fascination with cultural esoterica and trivia and so on was well-formed long before I got my first AOL account.
John Hodgman
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You are only pretentious if you are not sincere.
John Hodgman
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The reality is that there is an enormous value to gut-check instinctive decision-making in the world that is not hampered by reams and reams of research and complexity.
John Hodgman
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You know, I began my life as a creative person writing true things for magazines and telling some very honest, straightforward personal essaying for This American Life, but until someone forces you, with a deadline, to really observe your life - unless you're motivated to do it yourself - there's so many stories that you miss.
John Hodgman
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I am not a villain.I'm an only-child narcissist monster, but I wish no ill, nor do I wish for world domination what a hassle that would be!
John Hodgman
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Part of the transaction between writer and reader is the pleasure of building a community and encouraging people to play along.
John Hodgman
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Terry Gross. I would rush home from high school to listen to Terry Gross.
John Hodgman
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A lot of media that that I want to consume, I don't want to have to own forever and ever. It's not like real estate.
John Hodgman
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A literary agent is nothing but a cheap salesman (or woman) while a writer is a cheap salesman (or woman) who also has to actually write the books.
John Hodgman
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This is one of the defining sorrows of books: that we cannot see one another.
John Hodgman
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Only the nerds will save the earth.
John Hodgman
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If you have not seen it, FOOTBALL is a game in which men shove one another back and forth for no reason. They do not choose how, when, or whom they shove. They are doing this in order to please one angry old man on the sidelines. This old man is called the 'coach' or 'yelling surrogate' dad who will never be happy.
John Hodgman
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So much of creativity is the feeling that you're either getting a gift from some other dimension or some other part of yourself.
John Hodgman
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I've made my evolutionary purpose and had children. I don't care if anybody likes me, I'm going to do what I want to do. I'm going to do a whole comedy show about swimming in the loathsomely cold waters of Maine.
John Hodgman
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My type of humor is me not caring whether people know what I'm talking about or not.
John Hodgman
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We estimate that there are perhaps 20,000 prehistoric hunter-gatherers frozen up in those glaciers. Now, if they simply thaw and wander around, it's not a problem, but if they find a leader - a Captain Caveman, if you will - we'll be facing an even more serious problem.
John Hodgman
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It seems that every generation needs its public, tweedy, literary personality to sell its consumer electronics. To whatever degree I can live up to the Plimptonian legacy, I am humble and proud.
John Hodgman
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Everyone wants to write a book. Very few people are able to do it.
John Hodgman