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Where do you come up with these zingers, Clint? Do you own some kind of joke factory in Indonesia where you've got eight-year-olds working ninety hours a week to deliver you that kind of top-quality witticism? There are boy bands with more original material.

John Green

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John Green
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: August 24
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Indianapolis
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John Michael Green
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I feel like, like, how you matter is defined by the things that matter to you. You matter as much as the things that matter to you.
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Headline? he asked. 'Swing Set Needs Home,' I said. 'Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,' he said. 'Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,' I said.
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Imagining isn't perfect. You can't get all the way inside someone else...But imagining being someone else, or the world being something else, is the only way in. It is the machine that kills fascists.
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When people call people nerds, mostly what they're saying is, 'you like stuff.' Which is not a good insult at all, like, 'you are too enthusiastic about the miracle of human conscience.
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My heart is really pounding, I said. That's how you know you're having fun, Margo said.
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That's who you really like. The people you can think out loud in front of.
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...whatever you're worried about, you're bigger than the worries.
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As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.
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Something invisible snapped inside her.
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I just want you to be happy. If that’s with me or with someone else or with nobody. I just want you to be happy.
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That doesn't sound like my Margo, she said, and I thought of my Margo, and all of us looking at her reflection in different funhouse mirrors.
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Becoming a father made me much more interested in the parent character in my novels. I've never found parents that interesting.
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What's the meaning of life? Other people.
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Dumpers may not always be the heartbreakers, and the Dumpees may not always be the heartbroken. But everyone has a tendency.
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I'm a grenade, I just want to stay away from people and read books, and think.
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The internet is necessarily public. It can be filtered-public or censored-public, but it necessarily has to be open and available.
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Hi, I’m at the Speedway at Eighty-sixth and Ditch, and I need an ambulance. The great love of my life has a malfunctioning G-tube.
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People, I thought, wanted security. They couldn't bear the idea of death being a big black nothing, couldn't bear the thought of their loved ones not existing, and couldn't even imagine themselves not existing. I finally decided that people believed in an afterlife because they couldn't bear not to.
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JP shouted, TELL THEM WHAT YOU JUST DID TO EACH OTHER! Um, I said. We kissed, the Duke said. That's kinda gay, Keun said. I AM A GIRL. Yeah, I know, but so is Tobin, Keun said.
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The labyrinth blows, but I choose it.
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