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When I was in school, I was beaten every 30 minutes. It never did me any harm except for some psychological mal-adjustments and blurred vision.
John Cleese
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John Cleese
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: October 27
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Weston-super-Mare
Somerset
John Marwood Cleese
Psychological
Harm
Except
Minutes
Vision
Blurred
School
Adjustments
Every
Adjustment
Never
Beaten
More quotes by John Cleese
If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?
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It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor
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By watching the great, old comedians I picked up a few tricks about how to do physical comedy. And whenever I could learn something, I sort of added that to my repertoire.
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When we hold a World Championship for a particular sport, we invite teams from other countries to play as well.
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When people quote sketches to me, half the time I don't know what they're talking about so I have to sort of go, aha, yes, oh yep, I remember that and lie my way out of it.
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Everything in comedy's got to be exactly right, which is why making a comedic film is kind of a difficult process, because, for most of the two years of shooting it and editing it and reshooting and all of that, it's not quite right. And it's only when you just at the end, you put the final polish on it, it becomes really funny again.
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I think that money spoils most things, once it becomes the primary motivating force.
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Your Mother was A Hamster and you Father Smelled of elder berries.
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I think we're all born with a sense of humor. Creativity is another thing though.
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If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you open to my ideas
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The one thing I remember about Christmas was that my father used to take me out in a boat about ten miles offshore on Christmas Day, and I used to have to swim back. Extraordinary. It was a ritual. Mind you, that wasn't the hard part. The difficult bit was getting out of the sack.
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My views are heretical to people who believe in political correctness.
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The World is insane. With tiny spots of sanity, here and there... Not the other way around!
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Some actors, I think, want to feel that they are as creative as the writer. And the answer is, frankly, they're not.
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Come to me. I want to plow you like a Calgary driveway at Christmas.
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The most creative people have this childlike facility to play.
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The British fans are liable to suddenly be talking to you about something that you don't know how you got into the conversation. I think it's something to do with the fact that they've been watching you for so many years sort of you telling your story.
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Filming takes a lot out of you. It really does. It's immensely demanding, and you have to put the rest of your life in the icebox until you do your final shot.
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Aping urbanity, Oozing with vanity, Plump as a manatee, Faking humanity, Intellectual inanity, Journalistic calamity, Fox Noise insanity, You're a profanity, Hannity.
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I tend to have an odd split in my mind: I tend to look at it as a writer and when the writing thing is OK and I'm happy with it, then I put on my actor's hat.
John Cleese
