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There's nothing good on the television let's burn a witch. It must have been terribly exciting to live in those times.

John Cleese

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John Cleese
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: October 27
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Weston-super-Mare
Somerset
John Marwood Cleese
Burn
Exciting
Television
Times
Live
Nothing
Must
Terribly
Good
Witch

More quotes by John Cleese

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I was always a sports nut but I've lost interest now in whether one bunch of mercenaries in north London is going to beat another bunch of mercenaries from west London.
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It’s only on the brink that people find the will to change. Only at the precipice do we evolve.
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Muslims, who have a completely different value system, come to the West, then they should accept that there are certain basic values in the West intrinsic to our culture. Just as I wouldn't suggest that any Westerner walk down the streets of Saudi Arabia in a bikini.
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Life is a terminal disease, and it is sexually transmitted.
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Michael Palin decided to give up on his considerable comedy talents to make those dreadfully tedious travel shows. Have you ever tried to watch one?
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If you really don't know where to start or if you're stuck, start generating random connections and allow your intuition to tell you if one might lead somewhere interesting.
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It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor
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years ago we would have been burned for this. Now what I am suggesting is that we've advanced.
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Laughter destroys any divisions between people.
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Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.
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Because, as we all know, it’s easier to do trivial things that are urgent than it is to do important things that are not urgent, like thinking. And it’s also easier to do little things we know we can do than to start on big things that we’re not so sure about.
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Loving your neighbour as much as yourself is practically bloody impossible? You might as well have a commandment that states,'Thou shalt fly'.
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What's the bleedin' point?
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If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?
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I think the problem with people like this is that they are so stupid that they have no idea how stupid they are.
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A satisfied customer. We should have him stuffed.
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I was a terrible dancer. I dance like an Englishman.
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If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And if I can persuade you to laugh at the particular point I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge its truth.
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Filming is like a long air journey: there's so much hanging around and boredom that they keep giving you food.
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Bureaucrats shouldn't be in charge of comedy.
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