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If you wish to kill yourself but lack the courage to, I think a visit to Palmerston North will do the trick.
John Cleese
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John Cleese
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: October 27
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Weston-super-Mare
Somerset
John Marwood Cleese
Thinking
Trick
North
Tricks
Lack
Kill
Courage
Wish
Think
Visit
More quotes by John Cleese
I could take an umbrella and balance it on my chin or on my foot. And I just got interested in that kind of thing. And as I played games more and more and got stronger physically, I just became more coordinated.
John Cleese
God was treated like this powerful, erratic, rather punitive father who has to be pacified and praised. You know, flattered.
John Cleese
I wish you wusses would stop whining about your unhappiness. I'm really fed up with it. Pour yourself a scotch and pull yourself together. Go out and shoot something!
John Cleese
Come to me. I want to plow you like a Calgary driveway at Christmas.
John Cleese
What's the bleedin' point?
John Cleese
It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor
John Cleese
I have several times made a poor choice by avoiding a necessary confrontation.
John Cleese
My mum died about three years ago at the age of 101, and just towards the end, as she began to run out of energy, she did actually stop trying to tell me what to do most of the time.
John Cleese
Your Mother was A Hamster and you Father Smelled of elder berries.
John Cleese
Students who laugh more- learn more. Students who laugh more earn more.
John Cleese
My views are heretical to people who believe in political correctness.
John Cleese
A satisfied customer. We should have him stuffed.
John Cleese
The British fans are liable to suddenly be talking to you about something that you don't know how you got into the conversation. I think it's something to do with the fact that they've been watching you for so many years sort of you telling your story.
John Cleese
When I was in school, I was beaten every 30 minutes. It never did me any harm except for some psychological mal-adjustments and blurred vision.
John Cleese
Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.
John Cleese
Creativity is not a talent. It is a way of operating.
John Cleese
If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And if I can persuade you to laugh at the particular point I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge its truth.
John Cleese
I think it takes a long time, as you get older, to realize just how crazy the world is, just how ridiculous it all is.
John Cleese
Bureaucrats shouldn't be in charge of comedy.
John Cleese
I think we're all born with a sense of humor. Creativity is another thing though.
John Cleese