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I think the problem with people like this is that they are so stupid that they have no idea how stupid they are.

John Cleese

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John Cleese
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: October 27
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Weston-super-Mare
Somerset
John Marwood Cleese
People
Stupid
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More quotes by John Cleese

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Ask yourself, When does this decision have to be taken? and having answered it, defer the decision until then, in order to give yourself maximum pondering time.
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If I like chocolate it won't surprise you that I have a few chocolates in my fridge, but if you find out I've got 16 warehouses full of chocolate, you'd think I was insane. All these rich guys are insane, obsessive compulsive twits obsessed with money - money is all they think about - they're all nuts.
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I get bored easily. I've been bored most of my life.
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I can do anything I want, I'm eccentric!
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I want to write a book which is the history of comedy.
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The British fans are liable to suddenly be talking to you about something that you don't know how you got into the conversation. I think it's something to do with the fact that they've been watching you for so many years sort of you telling your story.
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Your Mother was A Hamster and you Father Smelled of elder berries.
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The most creative people have learned to tolerate the slight discomfort of indecision for much longer and so, just because they put in more pondering time, their solutions are more creative.
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years ago we would have been burned for this. Now what I am suggesting is that we've advanced.
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Telling people how to be creative is easy - being creative is difficult.
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I think it takes a long time, as you get older, to realize just how crazy the world is, just how ridiculous it all is.
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The Americans all love 'The Holy Grail', and the English all love 'Life Of Brian', and I'm afraid on this one, I side with the English.
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If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?
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Sci-fi has never really been my bag. But I do believe in a lot of weird things these days, such as synchronicity. Quantum physics suggests it's possible, so why not?
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Filming takes a lot out of you. It really does. It's immensely demanding, and you have to put the rest of your life in the icebox until you do your final shot.
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Political correctness is a bit like a granny, a maiden aunt arriving at a party when everyone's having a good time. And she comes in, they all start sort of buttoning up and becoming self-conscious and behaving properly and then when she leaves, you can have fun again.
John Cleese
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Everything in comedy's got to be exactly right, which is why making a comedic film is kind of a difficult process, because, for most of the two years of shooting it and editing it and reshooting and all of that, it's not quite right. And it's only when you just at the end, you put the final polish on it, it becomes really funny again.
John Cleese
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Come to me. I want to plow you like a Calgary driveway at Christmas.
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I think it's because in America you always get the sense that if you fail, you can just pack up your things and go somewhere else and try again. But in England, it's so geographically small that if somebody succeeds here, it reduces your chances of succeeding.
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The thrill I got discovering Buster Keaton when I was growing up was so exciting. He was one of the greats.
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