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Life is a terminal disease, and it is sexually transmitted.
John Cleese
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John Cleese
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: October 27
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Weston-super-Mare
Somerset
John Marwood Cleese
Life
Transmitted
Terminal
Sexually
Disease
More quotes by John Cleese
Filming is like a long air journey: there's so much hanging around and boredom that they keep giving you food.
John Cleese
Come to me. I want to plow you like a Calgary driveway at Christmas.
John Cleese
When you've been doing comedy for forty years, you really do know most of the jokes. And even if you don't know a specific joke, you can pretty much guess what it's going to be.
John Cleese
By watching the great, old comedians I picked up a few tricks about how to do physical comedy. And whenever I could learn something, I sort of added that to my repertoire.
John Cleese
I'm not sure what's going on in Britain. I don't know what's going on in London. Because London is no longer an English city, and that's how they got the Olympics. I mean, they said, We're the most cosmopolitan city on Earth, but it doesn't feel English.
John Cleese
Filming takes a lot out of you. It really does. It's immensely demanding, and you have to put the rest of your life in the icebox until you do your final shot.
John Cleese
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
John Cleese
My hovercraft is full of eels.
John Cleese
It’s only on the brink that people find the will to change. Only at the precipice do we evolve.
John Cleese
If you wish to kill yourself but lack the courage to, I think a visit to Palmerston North will do the trick.
John Cleese
If you really don't know where to start or if you're stuck, start generating random connections and allow your intuition to tell you if one might lead somewhere interesting.
John Cleese
I'm always meeting new people, and my list of friends seems to change quite a bit.
John Cleese
Everything in comedy's got to be exactly right, which is why making a comedic film is kind of a difficult process, because, for most of the two years of shooting it and editing it and reshooting and all of that, it's not quite right. And it's only when you just at the end, you put the final polish on it, it becomes really funny again.
John Cleese
The thrill I got discovering Buster Keaton when I was growing up was so exciting. He was one of the greats.
John Cleese
Oh, I could spend my life having this conversation - look - please try to understand before one of us dies
John Cleese
Sci-fi has never really been my bag. But I do believe in a lot of weird things these days, such as synchronicity. Quantum physics suggests it's possible, so why not?
John Cleese
Ask yourself, When does this decision have to be taken? and having answered it, defer the decision until then, in order to give yourself maximum pondering time.
John Cleese
If you want creative workers, give them enough time to play.
John Cleese
The most creative people have this childlike facility to play.
John Cleese
Michael Palin decided to give up on his considerable comedy talents to make those dreadfully tedious travel shows. Have you ever tried to watch one?
John Cleese
