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Life is a terminal disease, and it is sexually transmitted.
John Cleese
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John Cleese
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: October 27
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Weston-super-Mare
Somerset
John Marwood Cleese
Life
Transmitted
Terminal
Sexually
Disease
More quotes by John Cleese
Laughter destroys any divisions between people.
John Cleese
I have several times made a poor choice by avoiding a necessary confrontation.
John Cleese
The one thing I remember about Christmas was that my father used to take me out in a boat about ten miles offshore on Christmas Day, and I used to have to swim back. Extraordinary. It was a ritual. Mind you, that wasn't the hard part. The difficult bit was getting out of the sack.
John Cleese
I think there are so many activities going on, like mountaineering. You know, you would pay good money not to have to do that, and yet there are people racing out who want to spend their spare time clambering up rocks.
John Cleese
Michael Palin decided to give up on his considerable comedy talents to make those dreadfully tedious travel shows. Have you ever tried to watch one?
John Cleese
Either people walk round dressed as chickens or they listen to Beethoven.
John Cleese
When people quote sketches to me, half the time I don't know what they're talking about so I have to sort of go, aha, yes, oh yep, I remember that and lie my way out of it.
John Cleese
Most of the bad taste I've been accused of has been generic bad taste it's been making fun of an idea as opposed to a person.
John Cleese
You have to create boundaries of space and then you have to create boundaries of time.
John Cleese
There are 3 basic differences between we British and you Americans. One, we speak English, and you don't. Two, when we have a World Championship, we invite teams from other nations. Three, when you meet the British head of State, you only have to get down on one knee.
John Cleese
Some actors, I think, want to feel that they are as creative as the writer. And the answer is, frankly, they're not.
John Cleese
Now most people do not want an ordinary life in which they do a job well, earn the respect of their collaborators and competitors, bring up a family and have friends. That's not enough any more, and I think that is absolutely tragic - and I'm not exaggerating - that people feel like a decent, ordinary, fun life is no longer enough.
John Cleese
Laughter is the best creative medicine.
John Cleese
The thrill I got discovering Buster Keaton when I was growing up was so exciting. He was one of the greats.
John Cleese
It's a plastic surgeon you need, not a doctor
John Cleese
Political correctness is a bit like a granny, a maiden aunt arriving at a party when everyone's having a good time. And she comes in, they all start sort of buttoning up and becoming self-conscious and behaving properly and then when she leaves, you can have fun again.
John Cleese
The Americans are just more enthusiastic and more likely to engage in hyperbole.
John Cleese
I was a terrible dancer. I dance like an Englishman.
John Cleese
I'm not sure what's going on in Britain. I don't know what's going on in London. Because London is no longer an English city, and that's how they got the Olympics. I mean, they said, We're the most cosmopolitan city on Earth, but it doesn't feel English.
John Cleese
Loving your neighbour as much as yourself is practically bloody impossible? You might as well have a commandment that states,'Thou shalt fly'.
John Cleese
