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Oh, I could spend my life having this conversation - look - please try to understand before one of us dies
John Cleese
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John Cleese
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: October 27
Actor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Weston-super-Mare
Somerset
John Marwood Cleese
Life
Spend
Please
Dies
Funny
Understand
Look
Looks
Sarcastic
Trying
Conversation
More quotes by John Cleese
When I was in school, I was beaten every 30 minutes. It never did me any harm except for some psychological mal-adjustments and blurred vision.
John Cleese
Aping urbanity, Oozing with vanity, Plump as a manatee, Faking humanity, Intellectual inanity, Journalistic calamity, Fox Noise insanity, You're a profanity, Hannity.
John Cleese
I think it takes a long time, as you get older, to realize just how crazy the world is, just how ridiculous it all is.
John Cleese
Michael Palin decided to give up on his considerable comedy talents to make those dreadfully tedious travel shows. Have you ever tried to watch one?
John Cleese
I wish you wusses would stop whining about your unhappiness. I'm really fed up with it. Pour yourself a scotch and pull yourself together. Go out and shoot something!
John Cleese
Filming is like a long air journey: there's so much hanging around and boredom that they keep giving you food.
John Cleese
If you wish to kill yourself but lack the courage to, I think a visit to Palmerston North will do the trick.
John Cleese
I think there are so many activities going on, like mountaineering. You know, you would pay good money not to have to do that, and yet there are people racing out who want to spend their spare time clambering up rocks.
John Cleese
If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you open to my ideas
John Cleese
I think the problem with people like this is that they are so stupid that they have no idea how stupid they are.
John Cleese
I think we're all born with a sense of humor. Creativity is another thing though.
John Cleese
The most creative people have this childlike facility to play.
John Cleese
The thrill I got discovering Buster Keaton when I was growing up was so exciting. He was one of the greats.
John Cleese
I have a tendency sometimes to get too logical with what I'm writing, just because I want it to be kind of perfect.
John Cleese
If I like chocolate it won't surprise you that I have a few chocolates in my fridge, but if you find out I've got 16 warehouses full of chocolate, you'd think I was insane. All these rich guys are insane, obsessive compulsive twits obsessed with money - money is all they think about - they're all nuts.
John Cleese
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
John Cleese
The British fans are liable to suddenly be talking to you about something that you don't know how you got into the conversation. I think it's something to do with the fact that they've been watching you for so many years sort of you telling your story.
John Cleese
My hovercraft is full of eels.
John Cleese
If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And if I can persuade you to laugh at the particular point I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge its truth.
John Cleese
Filming takes a lot out of you. It really does. It's immensely demanding, and you have to put the rest of your life in the icebox until you do your final shot.
John Cleese
