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I don't really like actors. Actors are like terrible comedians with no punch lines. It's all about them. They talk about themselves all the time. They bore the sh - t out of you.

Joe Rogan

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Joe Rogan
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: August 11
Actor
Color Commentator
Judoka
Kickboxer
Podcaster
Stand-Up Comedian
Taekwondo Athlete
Television Actor
Television Producer
Thai Boxer
Newark
New Jersey
Joseph James Rogan
Terrible
Lines
Talk
Actors
Comedians
Really
Punch
Time
Bore
Like
Bores
Comedian

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People for the most part can smell lies, at least I thought that until I saw audiences applaud at Carlos Mencia.
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One of the most fascinating lessons I've absorbed about life is that the struggle is good.
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No matter how civilized we are and how much society has curbed violent behavior. Human beings still have the same genes they had 10,000 years ago. Our bodies are designed to have a certain amount of physical stress and violence in them. We're designed to run from jaguars and fight to defend our territory.
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I'm really happy that I've been able to make people laugh and distract them from their day to day bullshit at a comedy show or because they enjoyed one of my CDs or TV specials, but I don't know how many people have actually had life changing thoughts because of it.
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Stand-up is still my favorite, but the podcast is a close second. It's so fun, and it's given me the oppor-tunity to have three-hour conversations with people I wouldn't have otherwise been able to talk to. When I talked to Maynard Keenan from Tool, I almost couldn't believe it was happening.
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We live in a society that makes it really easy for these pussies to get by.
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It's a very strange thing when you make nature illegal.
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Comedy is really not like any other art form in that it's very specialized and varied in it's content, but generic in it's title.
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I prefer older people to college kids [as audience] for the most part. I want people with life experience, people that understand where I'm coming from.
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Peter Joseph is asking the questions and proposing the possible solutions that we should be demanding from the elected leaders of this crazy world. His brilliant analysis of this ridiculous system we're operating under is one of the most important voices for change in this generation.
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Build confidence and momentum with each good decision you make from here on out and choose to be inspired.
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When women go to see men strip, we never accuse you of hating men.
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I've done jiujitsu a huge chunk of my life, and I try to spend a lot of time educating people on the nuances, the subtleness of the ground game. It's a big part of mixed martial arts.
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I think there is more comedians now than ever, more venues now than ever. There are stand-ups who live in towns where they don't have many comedy clubs where they are organizing more comedy nights in bars. I just think this is a fantastic time for stand up.
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Anytime we go to a new town I try to book a show. I literally know nothing about the club.
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If you haven't peed the bed, you haven't taken enough chances.
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When I started out I was definitely more traditional. It was 1988. Everyone was doing the Jerry Seinfeld.
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Jiu-Jitsu has been one of the most valuable tools I've ever had in my life.
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Being a celebrity or anything else where you're really ambitious, it's really a game to see how successful you can get.
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That's my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.
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