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A lot of times, you beat a person who beat a person who can beat you. I mean, it doesn't make any sense.
Joe Rogan
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Joe Rogan
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: August 11
Actor
Color Commentator
Judoka
Kickboxer
Podcaster
Stand-Up Comedian
Taekwondo Athlete
Television Actor
Television Producer
Thai Boxer
Newark
New Jersey
Joseph James Rogan
Person
Mean
Make
Beat
Beats
Times
Sense
Doesn
Persons
More quotes by Joe Rogan
I'm a nightclub comic. That's what I do. I work in the clubs uncensored because my mind is uncensored, and those are the thoughts that I have. I do the kind of comedy that I would enjoy seeing.
Joe Rogan
The Universe rewards calculated risk and passion
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Never stay in a bad marriage, and don't hang around with psycho coke fiends.
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To really appreciate life you got to know you're going to die.
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I prefer older people to college kids [as audience] for the most part. I want people with life experience, people that understand where I'm coming from.
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Houston Alexander is for real!
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I want to talk about the nature of human beings or how we're evolving as a race.
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Despite all the advancements in science, and all things about religion that are disproved it still marches on. The bottom line is that the only real, absolutely provable answers about life and our place in the universe are provided by science, and religion has been holding down science since day one.
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You do what you're supposed to do, but you have to be honest about what they're doing. When you do a comedy show on a network the problem is there are going to be a bunch of people who aren't comedians that are going to tell you what's funny.
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The people who could most benefit from the self-reflective ego-dissolving qualities of cannabis are the ones that want it to be illegal.
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Jiu-Jitsu has been one of the most valuable tools I've ever had in my life.
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When women go to see men strip, we never accuse you of hating men.
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My company is called Talking Monkey, Inc. It's because that's what I think all people are: talking monkeys.
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After this whole acting thing is over and done, you eventually have to be human. Some people are never human. It's very weird.
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People do always try to smoke pot with me. But I think some of those people are cops.
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What people like are things to laugh at. Funny shows. It's all in the execution, the writing and the characters, not the setting. And the writing and the execution and the characters are GREAT on (Everybody Loves Raymond).
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When you're standing around for an hour doing stand up it's no big deal but when you're standing around watching a show for an hour - it's a big difference. It's annoying - your feet hurt, your back hurts - it's just not the most comfortable way to see stand-up comedy.
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I thought eventually I'd have a family and I really didn't want to be a loser like that guy in his 40s still shopping his band's shitty demo tapes around.
Joe Rogan
We live in a society that makes it really easy for these pussies to get by.
Joe Rogan
My act is so completely and totally uncensored that the only way I could really pull it off is if I treat the audience like they're my best friends.
Joe Rogan
