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I don't mind aging, I just don't want to be a day older.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Aging
Older
Mind

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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I think it's time they knew the truth about Beethoven.
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Looking 50 is great, if you're 60.
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I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool.
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Never floss a stranger.
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One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.
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God always comes up with a third act twist -- and we won't know until we die whether the play was a comedy or a tragedy.
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my cousin Shirley, who never complains, screamed and screamed when she was having her baby. True, this was just during conception.
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Every television show you go on is a choice.
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With age comes wisdom. You don't need big boobs to be feminine. Look at Liberace.
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Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the worst moment you can say: 'We will laugh tomorrow about this.' And you do.
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I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it.
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I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewelry.
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They almost had to cancel the Oscars tonight because all of the designers and stylists are still in line in San Francisco trying to marry one another.
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All babies look like Renée Zellweger pushed against a glass window.
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I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
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Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.
Joan Rivers
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My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.
Joan Rivers
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I was my own buddy in camp.
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I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial.
Joan Rivers
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Joan Collins told a reporter that she hasn't had plastic surgery come on... she's had more tucks than a motel bedsheet!
Joan Rivers