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I don't mind aging, I just don't want to be a day older.
Joan Rivers
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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Aging
Older
Mind
More quotes by Joan Rivers
I have so little sex appeal that my gynecologist calls me sir.
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Some women take up the law and become lawyers. Other women lay down the law and become wives.
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I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewelry.
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I love Israel for its blue and white flag as it matches my legs.
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What I love about jewelry is you can change it for something else without surgery.
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I have a million dollar figure ... but it's all loose change.
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Happiness, at my age, is breathing
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I think it's time they knew the truth about Beethoven.
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Now, I'm not against sex before marriage, but two minutes before? When the organist played Here Comes the Bride.
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Never floss a stranger.
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My sex life is so bad, my G-spot has been declared a historical landmark.
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A German sense of humor is an oxymoron.
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I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
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The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.
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Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the worst moment you can say: 'We will laugh tomorrow about this.' And you do.
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I will only praise someone who can't take anything away from me.
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I've learned to have absolutely no regrets about any jokes I've ever done.
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Why should I cook for my husband? So he can tell a hooker I make a delicious cake?
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My sex life has gone from bad to pathetic. My G spot stands for godforsaken.
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Don’t worry about the money. Love the process.
Joan Rivers