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A Mafia guy in Vegas gave me this advice: Run your own race, put on your blinders.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Running
Blinders
Mafia
Vegas
Gave
Advice
Guy
Race

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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Russell Brand has announced that he plans to write a series of children's books. First up: 'Horton Hears a Heroin Dealer.'
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I always like a charity with people who don't speak English because I get them to do all kinds of things around my house.
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A study says owning a dog makes you 10 years younger. My first thought was to rescue two more, but I don't want to go through menopause again.
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I have no methods. All I do is accept people as they are.
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I lived to be on stage, and I'm terrified. Terrified before every show.
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At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents.
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Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the worst moment you can say: 'We will laugh tomorrow about this.' And you do.
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My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.
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Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.
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Better laid than never.
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In every human endeavor, persistence is everything.
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What I love about jewelry is you can change it for something else without surgery.
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Acting is my true love. I would like to have been a serious actor, and I plan to in the next life. I'm gonna be Meryl Streep Rivers.
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I once dated a guy so dumb he could not count to 21 unless he was naked
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I've learned to have absolutely no regrets about any jokes I've ever done.
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My daughter and I are very close, we speak every single day and I call her every day and I say the same thing, pick up, I know you're there.
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I think actual death will be a lot easier than dying on stage. Cause - you know - if you do [actual death] right, you can go looking good. Maybe with a little quip [like]: 'I loved everybody.' But dying on stage...Oh, God!
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Show business can be an addiction. ... An audience would laugh at me one night, and I would chase that high for another three months.
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Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.
Joan Rivers
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If you don't go to Broadway, you're a fool. On Broadway, off Broadway, above Broadway, below Broadway, go! Don't tell me there isn't something wonderful playing. If I'm home in New York at night, I'm either at a Broadway or an Off Broadway show. We're in the theater capital of the world, and if you don't get it, you're an idiot.
Joan Rivers