Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
After we made love he took a piece of chalk and made an outline of my body.
Joan Rivers
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Piece
Took
Pieces
Body
Made
Chalk
Love
Outline
Outlines
Dating
More quotes by Joan Rivers
I have a million dollar figure ... but it's all loose change.
Joan Rivers
In life the only thing that you can expect is the unexpected the only surprise is a day that has none.
Joan Rivers
Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.
Joan Rivers
My routines come out of total unhappiness. My audiences are my group therapy.
Joan Rivers
Comedy is truth. We should not apologize for it.
Joan Rivers
With this face, I need all the deals I can get.
Joan Rivers
You’re going to get what I think is the truth, and it’s going to be raw.
Joan Rivers
That baby is so ugly... I've never seen a six-month-old so desperately in need of a wax.
Joan Rivers
I am not lucky. I am the type who would go to Lourdes and drown in the waters.
Joan Rivers
Can we talk?
Joan Rivers
My husband wanted to be cremated. I told him I'd scatter his ashes at Neiman Marcus - that way, I'd visit him every day.
Joan Rivers
I like my politicians and my judges and my lawyers to be simple. I think if you worry about where your hemline is you're really not concentrating on the world crisis.
Joan Rivers
The worst thing that ever happened to me on stage is someone ran forward to tell me they loved me and projectile vomited all over the stage. It was horrible.
Joan Rivers
You're college graduates now, so use your education. Remember: It's not who you know, it's whom.
Joan Rivers
All babies look like Renée Zellweger pushed against a glass window.
Joan Rivers
I am a dyke! And I'm damn proud of it!
Joan Rivers
[When told that her grandchild had her nose:] I didn't get this nose until I was thirty-four.
Joan Rivers
Anyone that says looks don't count is lying.
Joan Rivers
I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.
Joan Rivers
You know why I feel older? I went to buy sexy underwear and they automatically gift wrapped it.
Joan Rivers
