Quote

God always comes up with a third act twist -- and we won't know until we die whether the play was a comedy or a tragedy.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Always
Third
Thirds
Tragedy
Comedy
Dies
Whether
Comes
Twist
Play
Twists

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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On her daughter Melissa: The only time she really cried is when I sat her down and told her that she was not adopted.
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Show business can be an addiction. ... An audience would laugh at me one night, and I would chase that high for another three months.
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I am so out of the loop. I am never honored. My career is hilarious to me. I am either under the radar or over the radar.
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She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven.
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Don’t worry about the money. Love the process.
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In life the only thing that you can expect is the unexpected the only surprise is a day that has none.
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When you can laugh at yourself no one can ever make a fool of you.
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I was so flat I used to put Xs on my chest and write, 'You are here.' I wore angora sweaters just so the guys would have something to pet.
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Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.
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There's always an adjective before my name, and it's never a nice one.
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Comedy is truth. We should not apologize for it.
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A German sense of humor is an oxymoron.
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I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, Marry him, you'll double your wardrobe.
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Want to know why women don't blink during foreplay? Not enough time.
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But you do have to learn, if you want to be a satirist, you can't be part of the party. Meaning, you can't go horseback riding with Jackie O in Central Park if you're going to make a joke about her that night.
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Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.
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I enjoy life when things are happening. I don't care if it's good things or bad things. That means you're alive.
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Never admit that your back goes out more than you do
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Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?
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I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny.
Joan Rivers