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I wear the midi because I feel if you're going to look ugly, you may as well look this year's ugly.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Wells
Well
Midi
Looks
Ugly
Feel
Wear
Feels
Fashion
Going
Year
Years
May
Look

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The thing is, I'm happiest when I'm on stage.
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Last night I asked my husband, 'What's your favorite sexual position?' and he said, 'Next door.'
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I lived to be on stage, and I'm terrified. Terrified before every show.
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I was absorbing a sorry truth of show business - rejection is the norm and acceptance the oddity. I was learning to cut the tops off my highs and stay with the lows where the rejections and letdowns would be shallow.
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I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
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Happiness, at my age, is breathing
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Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.
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I said Justin Bieber looked like a little lesbian -- and I stand by it: He's the daughter Cher wishes she'd had.
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My grandson is mad at me. He's mad at me because I squandered his college fund on Spanx. It's a lot, but there's a lot going on here.
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Elizabeth Taylor was so fat that whenever she went to London in a red dress, 30 passengers would try to board her.
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I think it's time they knew the truth about Beethoven.
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They almost had to cancel the Oscars tonight because all of the designers and stylists are still in line in San Francisco trying to marry one another.
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my cousin Shirley, who never complains, screamed and screamed when she was having her baby. True, this was just during conception.
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God always comes up with a third act twist -- and we won't know until we die whether the play was a comedy or a tragedy.
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Comedy is truth. We should not apologize for it.
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I was my own buddy in camp.
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if you don't think that all life is improvisation, then you haven't been paying attention. Life is what happens to you while you're making other plans.
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I like my politicians and my judges and my lawyers to be simple. I think if you worry about where your hemline is you're really not concentrating on the world crisis.
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A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek. He gave her a lobotomy.
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Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.
Joan Rivers