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I wear the midi because I feel if you're going to look ugly, you may as well look this year's ugly.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Going
Year
Years
May
Look
Wells
Well
Midi
Looks
Ugly
Feel
Wear
Feels
Fashion

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it.
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You know you're getting old when you buy a sexy sheer nightgown and don't know anyone who can see through it.
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My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.
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A German sense of humor is an oxymoron.
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Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.
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If you're saying the same line 10 times and making it look like you just came up with it, that's acting.
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A study says owning a dog makes you 10 years younger. My first thought was to rescue two more, but I don't want to go through menopause again.
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I felt a comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.
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Anyone that says looks don't count is lying. Of course they do. Even babies go to the attractive face. It's the way humans work.
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You're college graduates now, so use your education. Remember: It's not who you know, it's whom.
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Because I'm the only performer who comes out and says I've had plastic surgery, I've become the plastic surgery poster girl, which is hilarious, because everybody has done it and they all deny it. They stand there, like the Bride of Frankenstein, they've all got stitches, and they all say, 'I've done nothing.' I talk about it.
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I think we obviously need health care. Of course we need health care, but I think that it's gone too far the other way, and I don't understand it. It's gotten so complicated. The minute they made a deal with the drug companies, you know something isn't kosher here.
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The only street I like is Rue Honore de Balzac, because 'Balzac' sound so gay, and I love my gays. I might like Parisians more if they named their streets only for gay icons, like Rue Liza Minnelli or Rue Bette Midler or, my favorite, Rue McClanahan.
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When a man has a birthday, he takes a day off. When a woman has a birthday, she takes at least three years off.
Joan Rivers
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Having a baby is definitely a labor of love.
Joan Rivers
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Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.
Joan Rivers
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Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief and, most of all, fear.
Joan Rivers
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if you don't think that all life is improvisation, then you haven't been paying attention. Life is what happens to you while you're making other plans.
Joan Rivers
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keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.
Joan Rivers
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Don’t worry about the money. Love the process.
Joan Rivers