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I felt a comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Courage
Grow
Tentatively
Comedy
Ego
Grows
Material
Looking
Materials
Felt
Gave
Begin
Beginning

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Age - it's the one mountain you can't overcome.
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I think it's time they knew the truth about Beethoven.
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I was the last girl in Larchmont, NY to get married. My mother had a sign up: Last Girl Before Freeway.
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Happiness, at my age, is breathing
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I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
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The psychic scars caused by believing that you are ugly leave a permanent mark on your personality.
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Last night I asked my husband, 'What's your favorite sexual position?' and he said, 'Next door.'
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Self-pity shortens your life.
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Never floss a stranger.
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When a man has a birthday, he takes a day off. When a woman has a birthday, she takes at least three years off.
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Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.
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I was so flat I used to put Xs on my chest and write, 'You are here.' I wore angora sweaters just so the guys would have something to pet.
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I think actual death will be a lot easier than dying on stage. Cause - you know - if you do [actual death] right, you can go looking good. Maybe with a little quip [like]: 'I loved everybody.' But dying on stage...Oh, God!
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One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.
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Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny.
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I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.
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Sold my house in LA, packed myself up and moved to New York, not knowing anybody. Friends are very hard to make after a certain age.
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I saw what's going on under my chin. I don't want to be the one the President has to pardon on Thanksgiving.
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I am definitely going to watch the Emmys this year! My makeup team is nominated for “Best Special Effects.”
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I adore my apartment in New York. It was a ballroom that I remade, so it's like a loft but done by Louis the Fifteenth.
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