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Happiness, at my age, is breathing

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Age
Happiness
Breathing
Inspiration

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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I was not an attractive child. When I didn't use my Girl Scouts uniform as a uniform, I used it as a tent.
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Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the worst moment you can say: 'We will laugh tomorrow about this.' And you do.
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I said to my husband, 'Why don't you call out my name when we're making love?' He said, 'I don't want to wake you up.'
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Money can't buy you happiness but it can pay for the plastic surgery.
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Having a baby can be a scream.
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Acting is my true love. I would like to have been a serious actor, and I plan to in the next life. I'm gonna be Meryl Streep Rivers.
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You’re going to get what I think is the truth, and it’s going to be raw.
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Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief and, most of all, fear.
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If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.
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I saw what's going on under my chin. I don't want to be the one the President has to pardon on Thanksgiving.
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I felt a comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.
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Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.
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It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who.
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If two people want to get married, get married! The Victorians had a great saying: As long as it doesn't scare the horses, do what you want. And I absolutely believe that.
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But you do have to learn, if you want to be a satirist, you can't be part of the party. Meaning, you can't go horseback riding with Jackie O in Central Park if you're going to make a joke about her that night.
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Having a baby is definitely a labor of love.
Joan Rivers
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The psychic scars caused by believing that you are ugly leave a permanent mark on your personality.
Joan Rivers
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Sold my house in LA, packed myself up and moved to New York, not knowing anybody. Friends are very hard to make after a certain age.
Joan Rivers
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When my husband Edgar and I were courting, he said he couldn't wait to have a baby. It was only after we were married that he changed his mind and decided that I should have the baby.
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I lived to be on stage, and I'm terrified. Terrified before every show.
Joan Rivers