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Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Powerful
Show
Shows
Postponed
Airs
Rapture
Final
Finals
Air

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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I lived to be on stage, and I'm terrified. Terrified before every show.
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Florida wants to change the state's motto to attract younger people. They're thinking about: More than just a great place to die.
Joan Rivers
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One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.
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I will only praise someone who can't take anything away from me.
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I think actual death will be a lot easier than dying on stage. Cause - you know - if you do [actual death] right, you can go looking good. Maybe with a little quip [like]: 'I loved everybody.' But dying on stage...Oh, God!
Joan Rivers
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I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
Joan Rivers
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Since I met him ten years ago there hasn't been a day that I didn't think of George Burns. And I didn't think of him again today.
Joan Rivers
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My sex life is so bad, my G-spot has been declared a historical landmark.
Joan Rivers
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I felt a comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.
Joan Rivers
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With this face, I need all the deals I can get.
Joan Rivers
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I have a wonderful psychiatrist that I see maybe once a year, because I don't need it. It all comes out onstage.
Joan Rivers
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I have no sex appeal and it has screwed me up for life my gynecologist examines me by telephone.
Joan Rivers
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Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.
Joan Rivers
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The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.
Joan Rivers
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I hate reality shows that are not reality.
Joan Rivers
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I'll lie still for a lot of things - but sex isn't one of them.
Joan Rivers
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I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.
Joan Rivers
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A Mafia guy in Vegas gave me this advice: Run your own race, put on your blinders.
Joan Rivers
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Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.
Joan Rivers
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my cousin Shirley, who never complains, screamed and screamed when she was having her baby. True, this was just during conception.
Joan Rivers