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One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Things
Think
Thinking
People
Rebellious
Allow
Woman
Mean

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I don't mind aging, I just don't want to be a day older.
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I think it's time they knew the truth about Beethoven.
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I saw what's going on under my chin. I don't want to be the one the President has to pardon on Thanksgiving.
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How to fool yourself into feeling younger: When you go to restaurants, always check a coat and a skateboard.
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Elizabeth Taylor was so fat that whenever she went to London in a red dress, 30 passengers would try to board her.
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The only street I like is Rue Honore de Balzac, because 'Balzac' sound so gay, and I love my gays. I might like Parisians more if they named their streets only for gay icons, like Rue Liza Minnelli or Rue Bette Midler or, my favorite, Rue McClanahan.
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Gay marriage, I am so against it because if all my gay friends get married, it will cost me a fortune in gifts.
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I wouldn't go over here to Lisa Rinna and I would say 'Are those breasts real, are you wearing underwear?'
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To the pessimist the light at the end of the tunnel is another train.
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keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.
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I adore my apartment in New York. It was a ballroom that I remade, so it's like a loft but done by Louis the Fifteenth.
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Life is very tough. If you don't laugh, it's tough.
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Put me up against Sarah Silverman and I could take her.
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In life the only thing that you can expect is the unexpected the only surprise is a day that has none.
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My daughter refuses to call me mother in public my little grandson calls me Spongeslob Squarebottom, and nobody else ever calls me at all.
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I’m never without a bandage.
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My routines come out of total unhappiness. My audiences are my group therapy.
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Since I met him ten years ago there hasn't been a day that I didn't think of George Burns. And I didn't think of him again today.
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Having a baby is definitely a labor of love.
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What I love about jewelry is you can change it for something else without surgery.
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