Quote

Anyone that says looks don't count is lying. Of course they do. Even babies go to the attractive face. It's the way humans work.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Way
Anyone
Face
Babies
Lying
Count
Faces
Attractive
Humans
Baby
Looks
Says
Even
Courses
Work
Course

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Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.
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At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents.
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I always like a charity with people who don't speak English because I get them to do all kinds of things around my house.
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My grandson is mad at me. He's mad at me because I squandered his college fund on Spanx. It's a lot, but there's a lot going on here.
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A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek. He gave her a lobotomy.
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I said to my husband, 'Why don't you call out my name when we're making love?' He said, 'I don't want to wake you up.'
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Self-pity shortens your life.
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I like my politicians and my judges and my lawyers to be simple. I think if you worry about where your hemline is you're really not concentrating on the world crisis.
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Bo Derek turned down the role of Helen Keller because she couldn't remember the lines.
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Travel is the excitement of life! Everything is an adventure, and if you look at it like that, even at the worst moment you can say: 'We will laugh tomorrow about this.' And you do.
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No more Botox for me. Betty White's bowels move more than my face.
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I saw what's going on under my chin. I don't want to be the one the President has to pardon on Thanksgiving.
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I felt a comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.
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You’re going to get what I think is the truth, and it’s going to be raw.
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My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.
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I can't like watching Project Runway with Heidi Klum. There's just something wrong about a German woman saying who goes and who stays
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Happiness, at my age, is breathing
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Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?
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Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.
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