Quote

I was getting dressed and a peeping tom looked in the window, took a look and pulled down the shade.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Getting
Toms
Look
Pulled
Looks
Dressed
Shade
Jokes
Window
Looked
Took
Peeping

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I felt a comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.
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I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.
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My face has been tucked in more times than a bedsheet at the Holiday Inn.
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If two people want to get married, get married! The Victorians had a great saying: As long as it doesn't scare the horses, do what you want. And I absolutely believe that.
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It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who.
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I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.
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All Angelina Jolie wants to do is do good for people. And she was saying to me: If I could just make one person happy, Joan, I'll die satisfied. I said: Easy! Just give Jennifer Aniston back her husband.
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My sex life is so bad, my G-spot has been declared a historical landmark.
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A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek. He gave her a lobotomy.
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Better laid than never.
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There is nothing funny about aging: It is rotten and depressing. Anyone who tells you otherwise just hasn't been paying attention.
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I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny. And when you're very, very happy, you're not very funny. You're just happy. I'd rather be damaged and funny.
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Acting is my true love. I would like to have been a serious actor, and I plan to in the next life. I'm gonna be Meryl Streep Rivers.
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I lived to be on stage, and I'm terrified. Terrified before every show.
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I have no methods. All I do is accept people as they are.
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I was absorbing a sorry truth of show business - rejection is the norm and acceptance the oddity. I was learning to cut the tops off my highs and stay with the lows where the rejections and letdowns would be shallow.
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I hate reality shows that are not reality.
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Every television show you go on is a choice.
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I have no sex appeal and it has screwed me up for life my gynecologist examines me by telephone.
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Elizabeth Taylor was so fat that whenever she went to London in a red dress, 30 passengers would try to board her.
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