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I was getting dressed and a peeping tom looked in the window, took a look and pulled down the shade.
Joan Rivers
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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Jokes
Window
Looked
Took
Peeping
Getting
Toms
Look
Pulled
Looks
Dressed
Shade
More quotes by Joan Rivers
I'm telling you that at eight she knew more about reproduction than Xerox.
Joan Rivers
I caused my husband's heart attack. In the middle of lovemaking I took the paper bag off my head. He dropped the Polaroid and keeled over and so did the hooker. It would have taken me half an hour to untie myself and call the paramedics, but fortunately the Great Dane could dial.
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Everyone needs a facelift, except if you are from Brooklyn then you need a nose job !!!
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Never buy a fur from a vegetarian.
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Bo Derek turned down the role of Helen Keller because she couldn't remember the lines.
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There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.
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Acting is my true love. I would like to have been a serious actor, and I plan to in the next life. I'm gonna be Meryl Streep Rivers.
Joan Rivers
I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.
Joan Rivers
I wear the midi because I feel if you're going to look ugly, you may as well look this year's ugly.
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Better laid than never.
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I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.
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Why should I cook for my husband? So he can tell a hooker I make a delicious cake?
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I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
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If you don't want gays in the military, make the uniforms ugly.
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She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven.
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You’re going to get what I think is the truth, and it’s going to be raw.
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Elizabeth Taylor was so fat that whenever she went to London in a red dress, 30 passengers would try to board her.
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Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.
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I enjoy life when things are happening. I don't care if it's good things or bad things. That means you're alive.
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you have to do more than just kill time or time will quickly kill you.
Joan Rivers