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My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.
Joan Rivers
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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Motherhood
Wheels
Memory
Watching
Stroller
Childhood
Strollers
Parents
Loosen
Memories
Earliest
Parent
Parenting
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As a wedding gift, Ray J gave Kim Kardashian his profits from their sex tape. It's 'Something Old' as well as 'Something Blew.'
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Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.
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My sex life has gone from bad to pathetic. My G spot stands for godforsaken.
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A German sense of humor is an oxymoron.
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I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, Marry him, you'll double your wardrobe.
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My daughter refuses to call me mother in public my little grandson calls me Spongeslob Squarebottom, and nobody else ever calls me at all.
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Everyone needs a facelift, except if you are from Brooklyn then you need a nose job !!!
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Life is very tough. If you don't laugh, it's tough.
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Two is company three is fifty bucks.
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I was not an attractive child. When I didn't use my Girl Scouts uniform as a uniform, I used it as a tent.
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I will only praise someone who can't take anything away from me.
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my cousin Shirley, who never complains, screamed and screamed when she was having her baby. True, this was just during conception.
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I don't mind aging, I just don't want to be a day older.
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Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.
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I am definitely going to watch the Emmys this year! My makeup team is nominated for “Best Special Effects.”
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I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
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How to fool yourself into feeling younger: When you go to restaurants, always check a coat and a skateboard.
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I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it.
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