Quote

Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Memorable
Cooks
Aging
Husband
Laughing
Hooker
Wife
Delicious
Woman
Cook
Makes
Cake

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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I have no sex appeal and it has screwed me up for life my gynecologist examines me by telephone.
Joan Rivers
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If you don't go to Broadway, you're a fool. On Broadway, off Broadway, above Broadway, below Broadway, go! Don't tell me there isn't something wonderful playing. If I'm home in New York at night, I'm either at a Broadway or an Off Broadway show. We're in the theater capital of the world, and if you don't get it, you're an idiot.
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I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.
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To the pessimist the light at the end of the tunnel is another train.
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I was absorbing a sorry truth of show business - rejection is the norm and acceptance the oddity. I was learning to cut the tops off my highs and stay with the lows where the rejections and letdowns would be shallow.
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Never buy a fur from a vegetarian.
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In life the only thing that you can expect is the unexpected the only surprise is a day that has none.
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My sex life has gone from bad to pathetic. My G spot stands for godforsaken.
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to maintain success, stamina is more important than talent. You have to learn to be a marathon runner.
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I saw what's going on under my chin. I don't want to be the one the President has to pardon on Thanksgiving.
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I lived to be on stage, and I'm terrified. Terrified before every show.
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She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven.
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Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.
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My earliest childhood memory was watching my parents loosen the wheels on my stroller.
Joan Rivers
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You know you're getting old when you buy a sexy sheer nightgown and don't know anyone who can see through it.
Joan Rivers
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you have to do more than just kill time or time will quickly kill you.
Joan Rivers
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Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.
Joan Rivers
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There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.
Joan Rivers
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Life goes by fast. Enjoy it...Everyone gets so upset about the wrong things.
Joan Rivers
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In every human endeavor, persistence is everything.
Joan Rivers