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Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds.
Joan Rivers
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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Favorite
Food
Elizabeth
Taylor
Fats
Seconds
More quotes by Joan Rivers
I once dated a guy so dumb he could not count to 21 unless he was naked
Joan Rivers
Age - it's the one mountain you can't overcome.
Joan Rivers
Never buy a fur from a vegetarian.
Joan Rivers
Oprah Winfrey is so powerful that she had the Rapture postponed until after her final show airs.
Joan Rivers
I know now that everybody in the arts is forever a beginner. Experience counts for a great deal and very little. Every night onstage I feel I am starting from scratch, still not quite sure what I am doing and where I am going, thrown by the simplest thing that goes wrong.
Joan Rivers
I'm telling you that at eight she knew more about reproduction than Xerox.
Joan Rivers
To the pessimist the light at the end of the tunnel is another train.
Joan Rivers
You know why I feel older? I went to buy sexy underwear and they automatically gift wrapped it.
Joan Rivers
Joan Collins told a reporter that she hasn't had plastic surgery come on... she's had more tucks than a motel bedsheet!
Joan Rivers
Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.
Joan Rivers
Never floss a stranger.
Joan Rivers
Looking 50 is great, if you're 60.
Joan Rivers
Florida wants to change the state's motto to attract younger people. They're thinking about: More than just a great place to die.
Joan Rivers
When you can laugh at yourself no one can ever make a fool of you.
Joan Rivers
I think we obviously need health care. Of course we need health care, but I think that it's gone too far the other way, and I don't understand it. It's gotten so complicated. The minute they made a deal with the drug companies, you know something isn't kosher here.
Joan Rivers
A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.
Joan Rivers
keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.
Joan Rivers
My sex life is so bad, my G-spot has been declared a historical landmark.
Joan Rivers
Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.
Joan Rivers
I like my politicians and my judges and my lawyers to be simple. I think if you worry about where your hemline is you're really not concentrating on the world crisis.
Joan Rivers