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I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Child
Country
Children
Think
Adopts
Thinking
Celebrity
World
Third
Thirds
Fool

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Last night I asked my husband, 'What's your favorite sexual position?' and he said, 'Next door.'
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I wear the midi because I feel if you're going to look ugly, you may as well look this year's ugly.
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I felt a comedy ego beginning to grow, which gave me the courage to begin tentatively looking into myself for material.
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Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.
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my cousin Shirley, who never complains, screamed and screamed when she was having her baby. True, this was just during conception.
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if you don't think that all life is improvisation, then you haven't been paying attention. Life is what happens to you while you're making other plans.
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Happiness, at my age, is breathing
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I always like a charity with people who don't speak English because I get them to do all kinds of things around my house.
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[When told that her grandchild had her nose:] I didn't get this nose until I was thirty-four.
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Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise.
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Now, I'm not against sex before marriage, but two minutes before? When the organist played Here Comes the Bride.
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Acting is my true love. I would like to have been a serious actor, and I plan to in the next life. I'm gonna be Meryl Streep Rivers.
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There's always an adjective before my name, and it's never a nice one.
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I don't think there'd be a Tina Fey now if I hadn't tried to look good in the beginning.
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With age comes wisdom. You don't need big boobs to be feminine. Look at Liberace.
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Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief and, most of all, fear.
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On her daughter Melissa: The only time she really cried is when I sat her down and told her that she was not adopted.
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Don’t worry about the money. Love the process.
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I was born in 1962, and the room next to me was 1963.
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I am a dyke! And I'm damn proud of it!
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