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I have a wonderful psychiatrist that I see maybe once a year, because I don't need it. It all comes out onstage.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Memorable
Wonderful
Maybe
Year
Comes
Need
Needs
Psychiatrist
Years
Onstage

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A woman went to a plastic surgeon and asked him to make her like Bo Derek. He gave her a lobotomy.
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keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.
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I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewelry.
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Whatever you do to recover from a loss, people will be critical because they believe that the only way to recover is their way. And you will even run into some people who should be run into by rhinos because they actually don't want to see you get over your tragedy at all grief is a spectator sport for them.
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[When told that her grandchild had her nose:] I didn't get this nose until I was thirty-four.
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I’m never without a bandage.
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I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, Marry him, you'll double your wardrobe.
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I'm telling you that at eight she knew more about reproduction than Xerox.
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I'm no cook. When I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.
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I have a million dollar figure ... but it's all loose change.
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Welcome to my world! I've been through it all, and I often pinch myself to believe my luck. I design jewlery, create cosmetics, perform comedy, act, lecture, write books, travel, have a fabulous daughter, and a phenomenal grandson-and I feel I'm the luckiest woman on the planet.
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When my husband Edgar and I were courting, he said he couldn't wait to have a baby. It was only after we were married that he changed his mind and decided that I should have the baby.
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I was the last girl in Larchmont, NY to get married. My mother had a sign up: Last Girl Before Freeway.
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My daughter refuses to call me mother in public my little grandson calls me Spongeslob Squarebottom, and nobody else ever calls me at all.
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As a wedding gift, Ray J gave Kim Kardashian his profits from their sex tape. It's 'Something Old' as well as 'Something Blew.'
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Trust your husband, adore your husband, and get as much as you can in your own name.
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You know you're getting old when you buy a sexy sheer nightgown and don't know anyone who can see through it.
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I have no methods. All I do is accept people as they are.
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Happiness, at my age, is breathing
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I enjoy life when things are happening. I don't care if it's good things or bad things. That means you're alive.
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