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She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven.
Joan Rivers
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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Understand
Numerals
War
Roman
Doesn
Eleven
Thought
Fought
World
Concept
Concepts
Stupid
Funny
More quotes by Joan Rivers
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I have a million dollar figure ... but it's all loose change.
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If you don't want gays in the military, make the uniforms ugly.
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I was getting dressed and a peeping tom looked in the window, took a look and pulled down the shade.
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At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents.
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The worst thing that ever happened to me on stage is someone ran forward to tell me they loved me and projectile vomited all over the stage. It was horrible.
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The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found.
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Everyone needs a facelift, except if you are from Brooklyn then you need a nose job !!!
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Two is company three is fifty bucks.
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Anyone that says looks don't count is lying. Of course they do. Even babies go to the attractive face. It's the way humans work.
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I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
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I was the last girl in Larchmont, NY to get married. My mother had a sign up: Last Girl Before Freeway.
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Al Roker said I am 80 years 'young' it's like saying Al Roker is 320 pounds 'thin'.
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You know you're getting old when you buy a sexy sheer nightgown and don't know anyone who can see through it.
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old age' is always ten years more than we are.
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Last night I asked my husband, 'What's your favorite sexual position?' and he said, 'Next door.'
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My routines come out of total unhappiness. My audiences are my group therapy.
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I think it's time they knew the truth about Beethoven.
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One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.
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I'm a double bagger. Not only does my husband put a bag over my face when we're making love, but he also puts a bag over his head in case mine falls off.
Joan Rivers
