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Our natures are a lot like oil, mix us with anything else, and we strive to swim on top.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Art
Else
Natures
Anything
Swimming
Like
Memorable
Swim
Oil
Strive
Behavior

More quotes by Joan Rivers

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I don't mind aging, I just don't want to be a day older.
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Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?
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Having a baby is definitely a labor of love.
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I've learned to have absolutely no regrets about any jokes I've ever done.
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Don’t worry about the money. Love the process.
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My daughter and I are very close, we speak every single day and I call her every day and I say the same thing, pick up, I know you're there.
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That baby is so ugly... I've never seen a six-month-old so desperately in need of a wax.
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The fun of working on the road means stealing from hotels. I've been doing it for so long, I have a set of towels from the Ark.
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I wouldn't go over here to Lisa Rinna and I would say 'Are those breasts real, are you wearing underwear?'
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I always like a charity with people who don't speak English because I get them to do all kinds of things around my house.
Joan Rivers
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The thing is, I'm happiest when I'm on stage.
Joan Rivers
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I love Israel for its blue and white flag as it matches my legs.
Joan Rivers
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Every comedian is furious. Age makes me angry. I'm unhappy at not being able to open packages anymore. I'm angry that libraries have gone. I hate children on planes. I'm very shallow, so they tend to be little things. To be honest, I think I was probably angry the day I was born, you know, about diapers or something.
Joan Rivers
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Acting is my true love. I would like to have been a serious actor, and I plan to in the next life. I'm gonna be Meryl Streep Rivers.
Joan Rivers
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I don't think I'm good in bed. My husband never said anything, but after we made love he'd take a piece of chalk and outline my body.
Joan Rivers
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The psychic scars caused by believing that you are ugly leave a permanent mark on your personality.
Joan Rivers
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keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.
Joan Rivers
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A study says owning a dog makes you 10 years younger. My first thought was to rescue two more, but I don't want to go through menopause again.
Joan Rivers
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I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny.
Joan Rivers
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One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.
Joan Rivers