Quote

My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash.

Joan Rivers

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Joan Rivers
Age: 81 †
Born: 1933
Born: June 8
Died: 2014
Died: September 4
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Personality
Brooklyn
New York
Joan Alexandra Molinsky
Cutting
Motherhood
Baby
Followed
Obstetricians
Year
Memorable
Leash
Kids
Dumb
Leashes
Years
Everywhere
Cord
Like
Dog
Cords
Gave
Forgot
Birth
Parenting

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I think any celebrity that adopts a child from a third world country is a fool.
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Never floss a stranger.
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Al Roker said I am 80 years 'young' it's like saying Al Roker is 320 pounds 'thin'.
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With this face, I need all the deals I can get.
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Florida wants to change the state's motto to attract younger people. They're thinking about: More than just a great place to die.
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I hate reality shows that are not reality.
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To the pessimist the light at the end of the tunnel is another train.
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keep moving. It's hard for old age to hit a moving target.
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you have to do more than just kill time or time will quickly kill you.
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I was absorbing a sorry truth of show business - rejection is the norm and acceptance the oddity. I was learning to cut the tops off my highs and stay with the lows where the rejections and letdowns would be shallow.
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You don’t marry for love. What does love got to do with marriage? I spit on love and marriage. You marry for money.
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Trust your husband, adore your husband, and get as much as you can in your own name.
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There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl.
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I'm racist? How can that even be possible? I was a friend of Michael Jackson's back when he was black.
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Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.
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Valentine's Day is different for old people. At this age I receive chocolates in boxes shaped like artificial hearts.
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My parents hated me. All I ever heard was, Why can't you be like your cousin Shelia? Why can't you be like your cousin Shelia? Shelia had died at birth.
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I have a wonderful psychiatrist that I see maybe once a year, because I don't need it. It all comes out onstage.
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