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You know it's time for a New Year's resolution to lose weight when you step on a talking scale and it says, One at a time, please.

Jo Brand

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Jo Brand
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: May 3
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Novelist
Nurse
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Wandsworth Town
Josephine Grace Brand
Talking
Weight
Years
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Time
Please
Steps
Lose
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Resolution
Loses
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Scales

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I used to get a lot of people saying 'Oh, you are such a lucky granny.' But the fact of the matter is you can be a grandma at 35 these days.
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I remember when Victoria Wood started to come through, and I thought she was great, though she and I are very different in our approach.
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One thing lots of Christians do have in common is that they can't help coming across as smug. This winds lots of people up, particularly because famous Christians pronounce on the life of the poor from their very lovely affluent homes filled with their very lovely families and attractive pets.
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I did try when I wasn't doing the singing to do as much comedy as I could because I thought with Comic Relief you are duty bound to anyway.
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I used to do bell ringing in Benenden church. It was really good fun, actually. My best friend's dad was the local vicar, and so it was expected as her best friend that I would go to church every Sunday with her.
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On the whole, you can have a private life and be famous. But when milestones happen in your life like having children or getting married, privacy goes out of the window.
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Inside every fat person there's a thin person looking to get out - They've just eaten them.
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Let's face it: I am not a professional runner.
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I've never been a fan of euphemism.
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I'm sure some cynical people would point to that as the main reason for doing it for a lot of people.
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Even when I wasn't overweight I was never one of those girls or women who wanted to look nice. I always thought it wasn't important.
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Occasionally, some sitcoms still stereotype women - the old dragon or the dolly bird - but on the whole we've moved away from that.
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I'm not a flag waver for obesity. It's not healthy, and you have a crap life because there is such a downer on it.
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I have such admiration for single mothers. I simply don't comprehend how you'd cope with that intensity, the lack of breaks, ever, on your own.
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People are so different in reality from the picture created of them on TV. So it's all a creation everything is made up.
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Regular panelists on shows can be terrifying. They own that space, and many guest comics suspect they are favoured in the edit, while their own hilarious jokes end up being ejected into the ether.
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I like men. They are hugely entertaining, but they have a lot of shortcomings and you just have to bear those in mind.
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An overweight guy went to the doctor who advised him to try a keep fit DVD. But the guy said he couldn't be bothered. “Well” suggested the doctor, “try something that leaves you a little short of breath.” So the buy took up smoking.
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It's a video release as well so I have to be perfectly honest and go, probably not specifically for DVD, but there are extra bits on it that aren't on anything else, so as exciting as that sounds.
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I think a lot of women are incredibly tough and they're just really admirable. Especially the way that, given what they've got, they just manage to carry on.
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