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I've never, ever had people being aggressive to me in public or abusing me, and actually quite a lot of men do say to me, 'You're quite good' - though they can't bear to go, 'You're great.'

Jo Brand

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Jo Brand
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: May 3
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Novelist
Nurse
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Wandsworth Town
Josephine Grace Brand
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Never
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Men
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Inside every fat person there's a thin person looking to get out - They've just eaten them.
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I think actors go along a continuum from Simon Callow down to kind of Ross Kemp, and I like to think of myself as the Ross Kemp of comedy. He's very good in 'East Enders' because he plays a version of himself. I think I can play a version of myself - that's about all I can do.
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I think it's difficult, if you're a quite private person like I am, to write about your life very intimately.
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My mum and my husband are from Irish backgrounds so we have a lot of potatoes. Chips, mashed, boiled, new potatoes, I love them all. Even the slightly wanky ones like Duchess potatoes that go up in a little spiral.
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I'm a Luddite with computers, and I'm slightly worried about being hacked as well.
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I like men. They are hugely entertaining, but they have a lot of shortcomings and you just have to bear those in mind.
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My mum always felt that women deserved as much as men, and should have as much power, so I suppose I opted to go into a very male-dominated arena to try and prove that.
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I have friends who vote Tory, and I'm appalled, but that's not to say they're not great people in so many other ways.
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I thought I was funny as a kid.
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There are lots of people who believe that caricature of me the tabloids created, so they think they don't like me.
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They say revenge is a dish best eaten cold, but for most people, by the time it's ready to eat, they just don't fancy it any more.
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No one I know is actually so rude as to tell me I've become duller since having children. But I'm sure they think it.
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I often tell audiences at the start of my shows that I'm not gay because I've got petitions from lesbian groups saying 'Can you tell people you're heterosexual because you're giving us a bad name.'
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It's actually very hard when you're settled in one place to completely uproot yourself and go.
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My doctor told me I should get out of breath three times a week, so I took up smoking.
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People are so different in reality from the picture created of them on TV. So it's all a creation everything is made up.
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People can forgive each other.
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I wouldn't say I was organised at all. I just have to prioritise. Is it more important for them to be organised, or to have their dinner, do you know what I mean?
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Suffice to say, many women find their first appearance on a comedy panel show to be their last. Second chances seem to be given less often to the female of the species.
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If I am totally honest, I would have to say that ''Allo 'Allo!' was not my cup of tea, even though lots of people loved it. For that reason, I find comedy fascinating. There is a huge difference between what people find funny.
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