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I like reading, I like boring things, and yet I think people for ages had this image of me that I was on the tube with a chainsaw looking for any likely candidate.
Jo Brand
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Jo Brand
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: May 3
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Novelist
Nurse
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Wandsworth Town
Josephine Grace Brand
Looking
Tube
Age
Tubes
Reading
Candidate
Things
Ages
Think
Candidates
Thinking
Likely
Like
Boring
People
Image
Chainsaw
More quotes by Jo Brand
I often tell audiences at the start of my shows that I'm not gay because I've got petitions from lesbian groups saying 'Can you tell people you're heterosexual because you're giving us a bad name.'
Jo Brand
I took my husband to the hospital yesterday to have 17 stitches out - that'll teach him to buy me a sewing kit for my birthday.
Jo Brand
When I got married, the Sun ran the headline: Here comes the bride, all fat and wide. Luckily, it was a few days after the wedding - but it was still hideous to read at a great romantic moment.
Jo Brand
I'm a real Kentish maid, you know.
Jo Brand
I think the key attributes for a good speaker are someone that's articulate and someone that puts a fair amount of humour into what they do.
Jo Brand
I thought I was funny as a kid.
Jo Brand
With two small children, I haven't had a wash since 2001 so the chance to go shopping is way down the list. It is something I do intend to get.
Jo Brand
I remember when Victoria Wood started to come through, and I thought she was great, though she and I are very different in our approach.
Jo Brand
I pay a bit more than lip-service to health: I don't eat chips or pre-prepared food, and it might be a comedy sacrilege to admit I do like vegetables, fruit and salad and stuff.
Jo Brand
Men are fantastic - as a concept.
Jo Brand
I find it difficult to judge myself, but people say that I have become a bit more socially acceptable over the years in terms of my material which apparently at the beginning - though I never really intended it to be - was man hating and now is just a bit more cuddly.
Jo Brand
My ex-boyfriend can round last night, which was weird because I didn't know he was in a coma.
Jo Brand
Television provokes strong opinions, and sometimes we try a bit too hard to appeal to everyone.
Jo Brand
I have big friends who won't go swimming because they're too embarrassed about it. I feel that's such a shame, because actually people should be encouraging fat people who are exercising to do it, not pointing and laughing.
Jo Brand
No one I know is actually so rude as to tell me I've become duller since having children. But I'm sure they think it.
Jo Brand
My mum and my husband are from Irish backgrounds so we have a lot of potatoes. Chips, mashed, boiled, new potatoes, I love them all. Even the slightly wanky ones like Duchess potatoes that go up in a little spiral.
Jo Brand
On the whole, you can have a private life and be famous. But when milestones happen in your life like having children or getting married, privacy goes out of the window.
Jo Brand
Having done a normal job for 10 years, as a psychiatric nurse dealing with emergencies, I know what terrible, hopeless lives some people have. So in many ways, it's great to be able to wield the financial power that I can, and do gigs, fundraisers or give money. I feel lucky I can help out.
Jo Brand
My mum always felt that women deserved as much as men, and should have as much power, so I suppose I opted to go into a very male-dominated arena to try and prove that.
Jo Brand
I think my comedy, the put-downs I do to hecklers, are the accumulated bitterness of years of people feeling that it's perfectly acceptable to make a comment on your appearance when they don't even know you.
Jo Brand