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I'm too nervous to eat before I go onstage, and I'll usually eat out after the performance or when I get home at midnight.

Jo Brand

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Jo Brand
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: May 3
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Novelist
Nurse
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Wandsworth Town
Josephine Grace Brand
Home
Onstage
Midnight
Performance
Nervous
Performances
Usually

More quotes by Jo Brand

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Over the years I attempted to make my style a bit more relaxed 'cause the initial style you couldn't watch for more than ten minutes without wanting to kill me.
Jo Brand
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You know it's time for a New Year's resolution to lose weight when you step on a talking scale and it says, One at a time, please.
Jo Brand
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Usually, what people in the public eye do is pick two charities and just exclusively work for them. But that means you have to turn people down all the time, so I try and do something for everyone that asks me, at least once.
Jo Brand
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School was great. There were no boys there, which didn't really bother me at the time because I had two brothers, so I was quite pleased not to spend any more time with boys.
Jo Brand
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I used to do bell ringing in Benenden church. It was really good fun, actually. My best friend's dad was the local vicar, and so it was expected as her best friend that I would go to church every Sunday with her.
Jo Brand
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I tend to think the world is a bit of a miserable place, so anyone who can add to people's optimistic, cheerful side is doing a good job, which is what I hope I'm doing.
Jo Brand
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How do you conduct an intimate relationship where no one ever loses it? Where no one ever lashes out, where no one ever smacks anyone in the mouth?
Jo Brand
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I believe that if your brain has to get to grips with complicated words, then you won't get Alzheimer's. I'm sure it's not true, but I do believe it.
Jo Brand
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No one I know is actually so rude as to tell me I've become duller since having children. But I'm sure they think it.
Jo Brand
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Let's face it: I am not a professional runner.
Jo Brand
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There's lots of different feminist groups. It's not as straightforward as just looking like a plumber.
Jo Brand
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Suffice to say, many women find their first appearance on a comedy panel show to be their last. Second chances seem to be given less often to the female of the species.
Jo Brand
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Inside every fat person there's a thin person looking to get out - They've just eaten them.
Jo Brand
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I buy smoked mackerel in a vain attempt at being healthy. I do actually really like it, and you don't have to cook it, which is handy.
Jo Brand
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There's still this underlying image of women that they should fulfil a certain role. It's no accident that a lot of men who are a bit misogynistic tend to say things like 'get back to the kitchen' or 'why aren't you at home looking after the kids'.
Jo Brand
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I think people tend to believe that women who are successful are probably neglecting their children, possibly a bit hard-nosed and that they don't really support other women very much - that they're men-haters and ball-breakers. I've certainly been on the receiving end of those 'compliments' for most of my career.
Jo Brand
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I often tell audiences at the start of my shows that I'm not gay because I've got petitions from lesbian groups saying 'Can you tell people you're heterosexual because you're giving us a bad name.'
Jo Brand
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I must be an anorexic because an anorexic looks in the mirror and sees a fat person.
Jo Brand
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When I was a nurse I never had much money, and I was still happy then.
Jo Brand
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I pay a bit more than lip-service to health: I don't eat chips or pre-prepared food, and it might be a comedy sacrilege to admit I do like vegetables, fruit and salad and stuff.
Jo Brand