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I don't like doing stand-up, because I don't like standing up.

Jo Brand

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Jo Brand
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: May 3
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Novelist
Nurse
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Wandsworth Town
Josephine Grace Brand
Standing
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More quotes by Jo Brand

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I'm a Luddite with computers, and I'm slightly worried about being hacked as well.
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I think the key attributes for a good speaker are someone that's articulate and someone that puts a fair amount of humour into what they do.
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There are 10-20 times more male comics than female comics it's something to do with the social structure of society.
Jo Brand
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The funny thing is, I don't actually think of myself as fat at all. I don't think I am. Not really.
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People can forgive each other.
Jo Brand
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No one I know is actually so rude as to tell me I've become duller since having children. But I'm sure they think it.
Jo Brand
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I think I'd concentrate on young women - particularly girls at school - and I would try and build into school curriculums much more education about relationships and how girls (and boys) can handle them: stuff about consent and that sort of thing.
Jo Brand
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I used to get a lot of people saying 'Oh, you are such a lucky granny.' But the fact of the matter is you can be a grandma at 35 these days.
Jo Brand
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I don't know really, it doesn't feel like it has changed to me but I think to have to move with the times. Try out different areas and not get stuck in 1978.
Jo Brand
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I think people tend to believe that women who are successful are probably neglecting their children, possibly a bit hard-nosed and that they don't really support other women very much - that they're men-haters and ball-breakers. I've certainly been on the receiving end of those 'compliments' for most of my career.
Jo Brand
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There are problems with nursing - such as the issue of nurses all having to do degrees these days. But that doesn’t mean to say the entire infrastructure of nursing is falling about and that it is populated by unfeeling psychopaths, which is, frankly, the implication sometimes.
Jo Brand
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I have friends who vote Tory, and I'm appalled, but that's not to say they're not great people in so many other ways.
Jo Brand
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I'm sure some cynical people would point to that as the main reason for doing it for a lot of people.
Jo Brand
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It is unrealistic to expect an entire profession to be completely good. There are bound to be some individuals who are stressed, who are unkind, who are a bit rubbish at their job, who are in the wrong career.
Jo Brand
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I was always being called upon to be an honorary boy alongside my brothers. I don't think I'd be a comic now if it hadn't been for that.
Jo Brand
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I believe that if your brain has to get to grips with complicated words, then you won't get Alzheimer's. I'm sure it's not true, but I do believe it.
Jo Brand
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My preference is swimming in the sea. I find the sea is more liberating, wild and good fun rather than plodding up and down a pool.
Jo Brand
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I think it's difficult, if you're a quite private person like I am, to write about your life very intimately.
Jo Brand
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I think my comedy, the put-downs I do to hecklers, are the accumulated bitterness of years of people feeling that it's perfectly acceptable to make a comment on your appearance when they don't even know you.
Jo Brand
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I buy smoked mackerel in a vain attempt at being healthy. I do actually really like it, and you don't have to cook it, which is handy.
Jo Brand