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When you get to know someone, you find there's something nasty in their woodshed.
Jo Brand
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Jo Brand
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: May 3
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Novelist
Nurse
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Wandsworth Town
Josephine Grace Brand
Woodshed
Nasty
Someone
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Something
More quotes by Jo Brand
There are two types of people in this world: one who opens a packet of biscuits, has one and puts the rest back in the cupboard, and one who eats the whole packet in one go.
Jo Brand
Wild men are so enormously attractive.
Jo Brand
I used to do bell ringing in Benenden church. It was really good fun, actually. My best friend's dad was the local vicar, and so it was expected as her best friend that I would go to church every Sunday with her.
Jo Brand
Let's face it: I am not a professional runner.
Jo Brand
I thought I was funny as a kid.
Jo Brand
I tend to think the world is a bit of a miserable place, so anyone who can add to people's optimistic, cheerful side is doing a good job, which is what I hope I'm doing.
Jo Brand
Men are fantastic - as a concept.
Jo Brand
Some men are deeply likable but have attitudes I don't like. Does that mean I should completely dismiss them? It's like saying: if someone votes Tory can you like them? And, yes, I can. I have friends who vote Tory, and I'm appalled, but that's not to say they're not great people in so many other ways. We have a tendency to oversimplify things.
Jo Brand
I don't hold any candle for drama versus comedy.
Jo Brand
I have friends who vote Tory, and I'm appalled, but that's not to say they're not great people in so many other ways.
Jo Brand
I went on the pill when I was 16, put on four stone... so that proved to be a very effective contraceptive.
Jo Brand
Anybody who has had the pleasure of reading an article about themselves in the press, knows that on the whole, there is a huge amount of inaccuracy, value judgment and the use of a crowbar to insert editorial bias that reflects the current political leaning of that particular paper.
Jo Brand
When I was a nurse I never had much money, and I was still happy then.
Jo Brand
I think some people ramp a side of themselves up for performance purposes.
Jo Brand
People say you should read your criticism because it will make you a better person but it doesn't. It just makes you a sad bitter old showbiz nightmare.
Jo Brand
When I got married, the Sun ran the headline: Here comes the bride, all fat and wide. Luckily, it was a few days after the wedding - but it was still hideous to read at a great romantic moment.
Jo Brand
I think the key attributes for a good speaker are someone that's articulate and someone that puts a fair amount of humour into what they do.
Jo Brand
I have such admiration for single mothers. I simply don't comprehend how you'd cope with that intensity, the lack of breaks, ever, on your own.
Jo Brand
I like reading, I like boring things, and yet I think people for ages had this image of me that I was on the tube with a chainsaw looking for any likely candidate.
Jo Brand
It is unrealistic to expect an entire profession to be completely good. There are bound to be some individuals who are stressed, who are unkind, who are a bit rubbish at their job, who are in the wrong career.
Jo Brand
