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I remember people saying to us, You're too nice. Hollywood is going to eat you up and spit you out. I never listened to them.

Jimmy Fallon

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Jimmy Fallon
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: September 19
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
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Brooklyn
New York
James Thomas Fallon
James Thomas Jimmy Fallon
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James Fallon
Never
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More quotes by Jimmy Fallon

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Newt Gingrich plans to announce his campaign for president this Wednesday. I don’t know about his chances. I mean, I’m not saying Gingrich peaked in the ‘90s, but his campaign is being sponsored by Tamagotchis and Crystal Pepsi.
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Happy birthday to Arnold Palmer, who turned 82. That's 41 years iced tea and 41 years lemonade.
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Over on the Democratic side, Martin O'Malley recently spoke about the need for Wall Street reform and said that he isn't running for president to be quote, 'wined and dined' by executives. Then Chris Christie said, 'And I am also not running to be wined.'
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Hillary Clinton made a campaign stop in Las Vegas yesterday. She said she wants citizenship for undocumented immigrants. But after seeing Americans celebrate Cinco de Mayo yesterday, immigrants said, 'You know what, we're good. We're gonna head back now. We had enough.'
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A new helicopter service called Gotham Air is now offering users cheap flights from Manhattan to JFK or Newark airports that start at just $99. If there's two words I trust together in the same sentence, it's 'cheap' and 'helicopter.'
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Joe Biden will speak to the nation's largest gay rights group during a human rights convention on Friday. Then on Saturday, he is scheduled to speak to them again to apologize for whatever he said in Friday's speech.
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Jeb Bush is facing criticism after it was just revealed that he checked off his race as 'Hispanic' on a voter registration form back in 2009. When asked if he regrets it now, Bush said, 'Si.'
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Politics is pop. Our job as comedians - especially me, as a late-night talk show, which is a broader audience - is to amplify what we think America is thinking.
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Sources say the Obama administration is in the 'final stages' of planning the closing of Guantanamo Bay. The way it's gonna work is, they're going to put a Radio Shack sign out front and let nature take its course.
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A top aide to Donald Trump says he quit the campaign this weekend because of Trump's public feuds, but Trump said he was fired. When asked what he was fired for, Trump said, 'Quitting!'
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When I see professional clowns, mimes, or people who makes ballon animals, I think of their relatives and how disappointed they must be.
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There are reports that Kim Jong Un climbed North Korea's highest mountain. Kim Jong Un said all it took to climb that mountain was hard work, determination, and lying about climbing that mountain.
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President Obama said that if he could have any superpower, he'd want the ability to speak any language. That's so everyone in the world could tell him he picked one of the lamest possible superpowers.
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I'm on so late I'm definitely the last seconds of anyone's attention. So I just want to give them something dumb to laugh at, so they go, 'That's funny,' then fall asleep.
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Donald Trump said he still wants to look more closely at Obama's birth certificate to make sure that it's real. Incidentally, President Obama said the same exact thing about Donald Trump's hair.
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We have first lady Michelle Obama on the show tonight. As you'd expect, security's been pretty tight. On my way in I got five pat-downs, and that was just from Joe Biden.
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Look, I know these Rick Perry jokes are a little mean, but tomorrow, he won't even remember them.
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NASA is developing space taxis to shuttle astronauts to the International Space Station. And just like New York taxis, they're all going to be driven by aliens.
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Here's a little bit of good news. The Coast Guard says that BP is now catching up to 630,000 gallons of oil a day. The bad news is that they're capturing it with ducks.
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