Quote

Yesterday in Florida, President Obama kissed a woman on the cheek after she told him he looks good. Which explains why last night, Michelle made him sleep on Air Mattress One.

Jimmy Fallon

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Jimmy Fallon
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: September 19
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
James Thomas Fallon
James Thomas Jimmy Fallon
James Thoms Fallon
James Fallon
President
Yesterday
Mattress
Night
Obama
Mattresses
Looks
Air
Michelle
Made
Told
Explains
Good
Sleep
Cheek
Lasts
Kissed
Last
Florida
Woman
Cheeks

More quotes by Jimmy Fallon

Image
I didn't invent the rainy day. I just own the best umbrella.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
It was announced today that Iran has reached a deal with the U.S. to limit its nuclear program and send most of its uranium to Russia. Then Americans said, 'That's great! Wait, WHAT?'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
A top aide to Donald Trump says he quit the campaign this weekend because of Trump's public feuds, but Trump said he was fired. When asked what he was fired for, Trump said, 'Quitting!'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
One GOP Congressman named Carlos Curbelo actually suggested that Donald Trump may be a 'phantom candidate' that has been planted by Democrats. The DNC strongly denied this - while Hillary said, 'Crap, they figured it out! Take off the wig, Bill.'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
The one thing you shouldn't do is try to tell a cab driver how to get somewhere.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
The heroic New York doctor who caught Ebola has been declared Ebola free. President Obama called the doctor to thank him for his selflessness and compassion. Then to be safe, Obama threw his phone in a trash can and lit it on fire.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
John McCain addressed critics who believe he will be too old to run for a sixth term in the Senate, saying that he's still healthy and ready to go. Then people around McCain said, 'Why is he talking to that mannequin?'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
During a speech on Sunday, President Obama said to the crowd, 'We've got to vote. Vote. Vote. Vote. Vote. Vote.' This went on for an hour until someone finally fixed his teleprompter.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Yesterday, the White House confirmed that President Obama will meet with Pope Francis during his visit in September. Some experts are wondering if they'll discuss their disagreement over contraception. Then Joe Biden said, 'I didn't even know they were dating.'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Officials from the soccer organization FIFA, which decides which cities get to host the World Cup, are accused of accepting bribes when making their decision. Of course the toughest part for the soccer officials was taking bribes without using their hands.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Donald Trump announced that he's running for president. During his speech he told the crowd that if elected he would be 'the greatest jobs president that God ever created.' Then God said, 'Hey, don't drag me into this publicity stunt.'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Iran said it will give up trying to make a nuclear weapon. But it got awkward when Iran said, 'But just for Lent. We'll start again on Monday.'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Happy birthday to Arnold Palmer, who turned 82. That's 41 years iced tea and 41 years lemonade.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Whenever I'm stuck in traffic, I can't help but wonder, 'Where did the creator of The Jetsons go, and why hasn't he done something about this?'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Apparently President Obama's favorite cocktail is a martini. When asked how he likes it, he said, 'On the beach, in Hawaii, in 2017.'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
I think you just look for the person you have the most fun with. And that's enough. You realize, Wait, I can just keep having fun with her forever? Yes, you can do that. That is the key.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
President Obama unveiled a $4 trillion budget for 2016 that would increase taxes on the wealthy and spend more money on education. He also made a snowball and put it in the oven, just to see which would last longer, his budget or the snowball.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
The big news is the midterm elections. Last night Republicans picked up a dozen seats in the House to give them their biggest majority since World War II. Or as they put it, 'Time to party like it's 1939!'
Jimmy Fallon
Image
Today Russia announced that it will join America's fight with the terror group ISIS. Then Putin said, But I did not say which side.
Jimmy Fallon
Image
A girl in New York whose parents were on Wife Swap is suing the show for 100-million dollars for making her look like a spoiled brat. Note to girl: guess what else makes you look like a spoiled brat? Being 15 and suing for a hundred million dollars.
Jimmy Fallon