Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
A Pennsylvania woman convicted for shoplifting was sentenced to wear a badge that reads Convicted Shoplifter. However, her lawyers hope to plea bargain down to a bumper sticker reading I'd Rather Be Stealing!.
Jimmy Fallon
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Jimmy Fallon
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: September 19
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
James Thomas Fallon
James Thomas Jimmy Fallon
James Thoms Fallon
James Fallon
However
Bargain
Shoplifting
Reading
Pennsylvania
Sentenced
Rather
Bargains
Plea
Hope
Reads
Convicted
Woman
Lawyers
Badge
Stealing
Sticker
Lawyer
Bumper
Wear
Badges
More quotes by Jimmy Fallon
Ted Cruz raised over a million dollars after announcing that he's running for president. Which is why today RadioShack announced that it is also running for president.
Jimmy Fallon
When I see professional clowns, mimes, or people who makes ballon animals, I think of their relatives and how disappointed they must be.
Jimmy Fallon
Whenever I'm stuck in traffic, I can't help but wonder, 'Where did the creator of The Jetsons go, and why hasn't he done something about this?'
Jimmy Fallon
New York Mayor Bill de Blasio has been positioning himself to challenge Hillary Clinton for the Democratic nomination. Hillary once developed a program to deliver rural healthcare, while de Blasio once dropped a groundhog on its head.
Jimmy Fallon
President Obama just made his first presidential trip to the state of Utah. Obama spent his time in Utah just like you'd expect - telling people, 'Uh, no, I don't play for the Jazz.'
Jimmy Fallon
The BP president said yesterday that the company would survive. That's like someone running over your dog and saying, 'Don't worry, my car is fine.'
Jimmy Fallon
President Obama had beer with four unemployed construction workers. And Obama asked the guys what was it like to lose their jobs, and they were like, 'Oh, you'll see.'
Jimmy Fallon
I, of course, wanted to do something with Drew Barrymore. Please. So we were reading scripts back and forth and then we found this script, Fever Pitch...
Jimmy Fallon
It was announced today that Iran has reached a deal with the U.S. to limit its nuclear program and send most of its uranium to Russia. Then Americans said, 'That's great! Wait, WHAT?'
Jimmy Fallon
Hillary Clinton has a $350 billion plan that she says will make college more affordable. Which has to be better than my parents' plan to make college affordable: 'Be good at sports.'
Jimmy Fallon
According to a new poll, Republicans are more likely to have a doughnut for breakfast, while Democrats prefer to eat bagels and croissants. While Independents are that annoying friend who's still looking at the menu after 15 minutes.
Jimmy Fallon
There's a new Facebook app that will post a final status update for you after you die. That's ridiculous. I don't need someone to change my status when I die. I need them to water my Farmville crops.
Jimmy Fallon
A new survey found that 12 percent of parents punish their kids by banning social networking sites. The other 88 percent punish their kids by joining social networking sites.
Jimmy Fallon
If you're going to do a Chris Christie joke, just say, 'Christie spent $82,000 at a concession stand at MetLife Stadium. Then he turned to his friends and said, 'You guys want anything?'' That's a joke. I can't believe it. I caved in. I feel awful.
Jimmy Fallon
Time magazine interviewed Bill Clinton about the current presidential campaign, and he claimed he had to ask Hillary to marry him three times before she said yes. Then Hillary was like, 'Yeah. That wasn't me.'
Jimmy Fallon
Yesterday President Obama traveled to Jamaica, where he will meet with students and Caribbean leaders. Jamaica's such a beautiful place, Obama says he can't wait to just take it all in, hold it for several seconds, and then exhale.
Jimmy Fallon
In an interview, President Obama said he recently deejayed a small dance party at the White House. Obama has a lot in common with deejays. He takes requests and then completely ignores them.
Jimmy Fallon
Thank you, yard sales, for being the perfect way to say to your neighbors: We think we're important enough to charge money for our garbage.
Jimmy Fallon
President Obama has reduced the sentences of 22 federal prisoners who were arrested for drug-related crimes - eight of whom were serving life sentences. It marks the first time someone has said 'Thanks Obama' but actually meant it.
Jimmy Fallon
This week, Georgia's board of education approved a plan that allows teachers to keep using the word Evolution when teaching biology. Though, as a compromise, dinosaurs are now called Jesus Horses.
Jimmy Fallon
