Quote

Cats have nine lives. Makes them ideal for experimentation.

Jimmy Carr

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Jimmy Carr
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 15
Comedian
Film Actor
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Writer
James Anthony Patrick Carr
Funny
Lives
Experimentation
Makes
Cats
Ideal
Cat
Nine
Ideals
Humor

More quotes by Jimmy Carr

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Yes, I have this crazy honk of a laugh.
Jimmy Carr
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A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true.
Jimmy Carr
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Saying that you don't believe in magic but do believe in god is a bit like saying you don't have sex with dogs, except labradors.
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I am trying to release endorphins here. I am not preaching to you - I am trying to make you laugh.
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I may be middle class, but I'm hard. 'Al dente', you could say.
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When people come over to my house for dinner, I always have a vegetarian option. They can make do, or they can **** off!
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I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one.
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All comedians are a bit attention-seeking and I'm no different. Anyone with the audacity to want to be listened to for an hour and a half must be.
Jimmy Carr
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Put Smarties tubes on cats legs, make them walk like a robot.
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I used to buy lottery tickets every week until I realised you could watch it on TV for nothing.
Jimmy Carr
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You never want to be the grumpy guy, although I do have quite a grumpy face.
Jimmy Carr
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Staying in luxury hotels still gives me a kick, especially Oulton Hall in Yorkshire. I'd stay in a hotel for the breakfast and room service.
Jimmy Carr
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My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying Can I have a new bike?. He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.
Jimmy Carr
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Women were quite terrifying until I was older. I think that's partly down to confidence.
Jimmy Carr
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I love those people who do story-telling and who ramble on, but I don't do that, I tell jokes - the sort of jokes that anyone really could tell in the pub.
Jimmy Carr
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It had to be hammered home quite a bit because I didn't see any humour in my life at all.
Jimmy Carr
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Recently my girlfriend asked me if I was having sex behind her back and I replied, Yes, who did you think it was?
Jimmy Carr
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The bigger the audience, the better with comedy.
Jimmy Carr
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British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray!
Jimmy Carr
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I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, it's juvenile, but that's me.
Jimmy Carr