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I was in love with the idea of being in love with a woman way before I was actually in love with one.

Jimmy Carr

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Jimmy Carr
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 15
Comedian
Film Actor
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Writer
James Anthony Patrick Carr
Actually
Woman
Idea
Ideas
Way
Love

More quotes by Jimmy Carr

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Jokes spread around the world and embed themselves in our shared culture the most resonant of them get lodged in the language in the same way as clichés or old wives' tales do.
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Boxers don't have sex before a fight. Do you know why that is? They don't fancy each other.
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Once I was doing a sponsored walk. In the end I managed to raise so much money, I could afford a taxi.
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Saying that you don't believe in magic but do believe in god is a bit like saying you don't have sex with dogs, except labradors.
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When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste. When I was in India last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton.
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After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the late-night pizza and watch the Jonathan Ross show instead.
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Yes, I have this crazy honk of a laugh.
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I was in the South of France. I saw a Brownie on a school trip. She was holding up a book. It said on the front 'rough guide'. I thought: 'Yeah' she's not a looker.
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I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought the obvious one was 'Shout For Help'.
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I worry about my nan. If she's alone and falls, does she make a noise? I'm joking, she's dead.
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If I'm at home for the weekend - and that is almost never - I tend to get twitchy at about eight o'clock in the evening because my body clock is timed to go on stage. I don't know what to do with myself.
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Viagra has instructions: 'Keep away from children' - what kind of man do you think I am?
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When I was a kid I had an imaginary friend and I used to think that he went everywhere with me, and that I could talk to him and that he could hear me, and that he could grant me wishes and stuff. And then I grew up, and I stopped going to church.
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I think being successful in comedy is being funny and making jokes - anything beyond that is the icing on the cake.
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I had a survey done on my house. 8 out of 10 people said they really rather liked it
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All comedians are a bit attention-seeking and I'm no different. Anyone with the audacity to want to be listened to for an hour and a half must be.
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I was a Christian. I didn't want to have sex before marriage, I was a bit uptight and not very self-confident. I was a virgin until I was 26.
Jimmy Carr
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Put Smarties tubes on cats legs, make them walk like a robot.
Jimmy Carr
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A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said, 'Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?' I said, 'All right, but we won't get much done.'
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I am trying to release endorphins here. I am not preaching to you - I am trying to make you laugh.
Jimmy Carr