Quote

All comedians are a bit attention-seeking and I'm no different. Anyone with the audacity to want to be listened to for an hour and a half must be.

Jimmy Carr

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Jimmy Carr
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 15
Comedian
Film Actor
Humorist
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Presenter
Writer
James Anthony Patrick Carr
Hour
Bits
Anyone
Attention
Audacity
Hours
Comedians
Half
Listened
Must
Comedian
Different
Seeking

More quotes by Jimmy Carr

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Boxers don't have sex before a fight. Do you know why that is? They don't fancy each other.
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Recently my girlfriend asked me if I was having sex behind her back and I replied, Yes, who did you think it was?
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I was a Christian. I didn't want to have sex before marriage, I was a bit uptight and not very self-confident. I was a virgin until I was 26.
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I may be middle class, but I'm hard. 'Al dente', you could say.
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But what's true about comedians is that we've all got a huge hole in our personality. In a room of 3,000 people, we're the one person facing in the opposite direction - yet we have this overwhelming desire to be liked.
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My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying Can I have a new bike?. He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.
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British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray!
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Once I was doing a sponsored walk. In the end I managed to raise so much money, I could afford a taxi.
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After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the late-night pizza and watch the Jonathan Ross show instead.
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I, of course, don't have an accent. This is just how things sound when they are pronounced properly.
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Remember to never answer a phone during sex, even if you hilariously answer with 'I can't talk now, I'm going into a tunnel'.
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Put Smarties tubes on cats legs, make them walk like a robot.
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Viagra has instructions: 'Keep away from children' - what kind of man do you think I am?
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It had to be hammered home quite a bit because I didn't see any humour in my life at all.
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The bigger the audience, the better with comedy.
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A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true.
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I had a survey done on my house. 8 out of 10 people said they really rather liked it
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I don't see myself as offending people.
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Cats have nine lives. Makes them ideal for experimentation.
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I worry about my nan. If she's alone and falls, does she make a noise? I'm joking, she's dead.
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